Generally Speaking, Golf Isn’t War, but Analogy Works Here

Tom Tomashek of the Wilmington News in Delaware was hopeful that the U.S. Open would come down to a “battle between (Chris) Patton and (Colin) Montgomerie.”

Of course, it didn’t as the 300-pound plus Patton withdrew after eight holes last Thursday and was treated in the medical tent for heat exhaustion.

“He didn’t withdraw,” Tomashek said, continuing his allusion to the U.S. and British generals in World War II, George Patton and Bernard Montgomery. “He retreated.”

Trivia time: Who has won the most consecutive men’s singles titles at Wimbledon since 1900?

Deputy dog: Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle writes that Preston of Scotland Yard is a dog, a yellow Labrador, who makes the rounds of Wimbledon’s grounds each day, including the press room, sniffing for explosives.

“Preston stuck his nose into the work bag of a reporter from Florida,” Ostler writes, “and put a jawlock on the scribe’s Danish salami-and-cheese sandwich, wrestling it to the ground.”

The Buddy watch: Greg Hansen in the Arizona Daily Star: “So the Arizona Cardinals have sold 48,122 season tickets, huh, almost double last year’s total of 24,842.

“It’s amazing what the cult of personality will do. (Coach) Buddy Ryan may be pulling off the the biggest bluff in NFL history, but he won’t be doing it in privacy.”

Out of bounds: Frank Hannigan, former executive director of the U.S. Golf Assn., won’t back down from his opinion that Arnold Palmer shouldn’t have been granted a special exemption to play in the U.S. Open.

“It’s not show business,” he told the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

Get real, Frank. Arnie made it show business.

Hoppy talk: John Eisenberg of the Baltimore Sun said that his favorite things in the World Cup experience are the translations at news conferences: “A five-minute answer from a superstar followed by an English translator pausing and saying, ‘Ahhh, Jorge say he is moch hoppy.’ ”

FYI: In the midst of World Cup hoopla in this country, 22 high school all-star football teams from 16 states, one of them California, will travel to Australia and New Zealand this summer to participate in the sixth annual “Down Under Bowl.”

In addition, 14 U.S. high school cheerleading and dance teams will provide sideline and halftime entertainment.

Looking back: On this day in 1969, Joe Frazier stopped Jerry Quarry in the eighth round at Madison Square Garden in a bout for the world heavyweight title as recognized by New York and several other states.

Trivia answer: Bjorn Borg of Sweden, with five--1976 to 1980.

Quotebook: Indiana Pacer President Donnie Walsh, on Coach Larry Brown’s need to have his second hip-replacement surgery: “It’s from diving for loose balls, because Dean Smith told us to.”