It Gets Harder, but He’s Doesn’t Have to Spell It

Cal football Coach Keith Gilbertson has it tough, really tough, and his toughest task is yet to come.

Tough: Cal lost to San Diego State, 33-9, and to Fresno State, 25-24.

Really tough: A San Francisco Chronicle columnist recently wrote: “Keith Gilbertson must go.” Another area columnist opened his work, writing, “This just in. Cal stinks.”

Toughest task yet: The Bears’ top receiver, who has been sidelined with a thumb injury, will return for next week’s game with San Jose State. That means Gilbertson will have to pronounce Iheanyi Uwaezuoke’s name.

“So far he’s just said, he when referring to him because he hasn’t been playing,” said Pete Treadwell, a media relations intern at Cal. “I was scared when I started because he’s one of our best players, but it took me about three weeks before I could both spell it and say it.”

Three weeks? The kids at Cal, of course, are pretty bright. For those who hail from schools elsewhere, it’s: ee-HAHN-ee ooh-WAY-zoh-kay.

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Advice from Dad: Archie Manning, former quarterback for the New Orleans Saints, had to contend with noisy crowds and dome stadiums during his 14-year NFL career. Now his son, Peyton, must contend with similar circumstances as starting quarterback for the University of Tennessee.

The Manning secret: Gargle.

“I want to be able to shout audibles without going hoarse,” explained the youngster.

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Trivia time: Cal Ripken Jr.’s consecutive-game streak hits 2,141 today. Cleveland and Minnesota defensive end Jim Marshall has the NFL record with 282 consecutive games. Who has the longest streak among active NFL players? (This is a trick question.)

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Ram fever: How is the one and only newspaper in St. Louis treating the Rams so far?

Well, two games into Rich Brooks’ tenure as NFL coach, St. Louis Post-Dispatch columnist Bernie Miklasz now refers to him regularly as Rich (Big Daddy) Brooks. It seems the players at the University of Oregon nicknamed Brooks “Big Daddy,” because he could be so intimidating to the younger players.

After the Rams’ first victory in St. Louis, Miklasz wrote: “Where are we, Toto? What’s happening? How did we get here? Is this really St. Louis, the conservative baseball town that supposedly has an allergic reaction to football? And are these really the Rams, the chronic losers who committed so many acts of tomfoolery that they were laughed out of Los Angeles by the several dozen fans who still cared?

” . . . Warn the NFL. Something funky is spreading. No one told us that the Rams would be 2-0, dancing with fans. All this spontaneous bliss may give Paul Tagliabue a migraine. We’re back. Deal with it, America.”

Taking a ride: Mark Purdy, San Jose Mercury News columnist, recently offered his unusual take on the Deion Sanders-goes-to-Dallas story:

“It seems to me that Sanders could wear you out after a while. He’s kind of like a Great America amusement park in cleats. You go to Great America maybe once or twice a year to ride the roller coaster. But do you really want to ride the roller coaster every day for five-straight years and pay $30 million to do it? Wouldn’t that make you sick? Good luck, Deion and happy indigestion, Dallas.”

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Add Deion: Clint Murchison Jr. paid $650,000 for the Cowboy franchise as an expansion-team owner. Cowboy owner Jerry Jones gave Sanders a $12-million signing bonus.

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Trivia answer: The 1987 NFL strike, which resulted in three games being played by replacement players, stopped all active streaks. The regulars returned to work during Week 7 of the 1987 season and since then 20 players have not missed a game. Notable on the list of those who have played in 124 consecutive games since are San Francisco wide receiver Jerry Rice and Green Bay defensive lineman Reggie White. There are no quarterbacks on the list.

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Quotebook: After the Rams’ victory in St. Louis last Sunday, owner Georgia Frontiere said, “I wanted to cry, but I didn’t have my waterproof mascara on.”