Hard Part Is Teaching Him Anything

Basketball people like to say, “You can’t teach tall,” which might explain Benoit Benjamin’s presence in the NBA after 11 of the least distinguished seasons in hoops history.

The Toronto Raptors recently signed the 7-foot, 246-pound Benjamin, who averaged 8.8 points, 6.5 rebounds and precisely one blocked shot in 83 games with the Vancouver Grizzlies and Milwaukee Bucks last season. He has career averages of 11.7 points, 7.7 rebounds and two blocks in 780 games with the Clippers, Seattle SuperSonics, Lakers, New Jersey Nets, Vancouver and Milwaukee.

Said an optimistic Isiah Thomas, the Raptors’ executive vice president: “Our track record has already proven that we can help players reach their potential, which makes this a good situation for Benoit.”

Most NBA situations are good for Benoit. Only his teams suffer.

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Trivia time: Who holds the Pacific 10 Conference football record for the longest field goal?

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Cowboy in cleats: Arizona Cardinal running back LeShon Johnson is a former rodeo rider. The name plate over his locker is a license plate that reads “COW BOY.”

He drives a monster pickup truck that has double tires in the rear.

“He should pay a docking fee for that thing,” kicker Greg Davis said.

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Will it ever end? From Jay Leno: “It’s autumn now. This is the shortest season of the year. Do you know what the longest season is? That’s the one currently being played by the New York Jets.”

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Incentive: Phoenix Coyote forward Keith Tkachuk is enjoying the weather in Arizona, in contrast to the team’s old home in Winnipeg.

“We’re doing as well as we possibly can so we can get a lot more days off from practice and golf a lot,” he said.

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Clothes call: A Romanian junior soccer team, trailing 16-0, fled the field two minutes before the end of a recent game in Bucharest.

According to the newspaper Evenimentul Zilei, fans threatened to strip them naked if they gave up two more goals.

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Fouling machine: Blackie Sherrod in the Dallas Morning News: “Once against Dizzy Trout, Luke Appling, the old [Chicago] White Sox shortstop, fouled 14 consecutive pitches.

“Trout, in disgust, threw his glove instead of the ball. ‘I fouled that one off too,’ said Luke.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1946, UCLA defeated Stanford, 26-6. The Bruins went on to a 10-0 regular season before losing to Illinois in the Rose Bowl, 45-14.

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Trivia answer: Jason Hanson of Washington State, 62 yards against Nevada Las Vegas in 1991.

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And finally: Washington Husky Coach Jim Lambright had this response when an interviewer asked if his players knew who Knute Rockne was:

“My players don’t even remember who Ronald Reagan was, much less Knute Rockne.”