Pint-Sized Punch Lines

* What did the dentist give the band director? A tuba toothpaste. (Clyde Winton, 6, Walnut, Walnut Elementary)

* What do you get when you cross a pig with a tree? A porky-pine. (Benjamin Schwartz, 8, Tarzana, Castlemont School)

* Why was the belt arrested? Because it held up a pair of pants! (Michael Eaton Jr., 7, Bedford, Texas, Highlands School)

* What can you hold in your left hand that you can't hold in your right hand? Your right elbow. (Alexander Givens, 6, Encino, Nestle Elementary)

* What do you buy for someone who has everything? A burglar alarm. (Elisa Mills, 12, Monterey Park, Our Lady of the Miraculous Medal)

* What has four eyes but cannot see? The Mississippi. (Jonathan Cohen, 6, Los Angeles, Rabbi Jacob Pressman Academy)


* SEND US A LINE: Kids, got a joke? Send it to Pint-Sized Punch Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Life & Style, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053. Include (print, please) your full name, age, hometown and school.

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