Caution Thrown to Steamed Rice

A review of Week 12 in the NFL, and, boohoo, Jerry Rice says he is not having a good time and he’s threatening to take his ball and go home if the 49ers don’t throw to him more.

“Is this something that might want to make you retire? Hell yes,” said Rice. “Maybe it’s time for me to move on. . . . It’s not 49er football anymore.”

One week ago San Francisco played 49er football, Rice caught 10 passes and the 49ers lost.

This week he caught three, San Francisco won and he began stamping his feet.

“Jerry is showing a tremendous amount of maturity,” said San Francisco quarterback Steve Young, and in comparison to Rice’s previous selfish outbursts, he probably has a point.

HE COULD BE PLAYING FOR . . .

* The New York Giants. Imagine the tantrum Rice would throw then. The Giants haven’t had a 100-yard receiver in 18 straight games, the NFL’s longest streak. Of course they haven’t had a quarterback throw for 300 yards in 80 consecutive games.

* The Chicago Bears. Imagine the look on Rice’s face if he had to run pass patterns for Steve Stenstrom, who has not led the team to a touchdown in its last 26 drives--spanning 11 quarters.

* The Minnesota Vikings. By now he would be demanding the benching of Randy Moss.

THE THINGS THEY SAY

* After his team won, Giant Coach Jim Fassel remarked, “When you shut the other team out, that means you played very, very well.”

No it doesn’t. It means you played the Philadelphia Eagles.

* After Buffalo receiver Andre Reed stiff-armed Indianapolis cornerback Tyrone Poole to avoid being tackled on his way to a 67-yard touchdown, Colt Coach Jim Mora said, “You’ve got to tackle people, that’s a bunch of baloney.”

As a rule, no one ever quite understands what Mora is saying.

* The game is too sophisticated and complicated for most people, and that’s why only a select few can rise to the level of head coach. After his team’s failure to win again, Bear Coach Dave Wannstedt offered the following analysis: “We’ve got to find some way to score.”

STATISTICS TO PONDER

Cincinnati may be in need of last rites, but the Bengals won’t be calling on Priest. You know, Priest Holmes, Baltimore’s nondrafted rookie running back from Texas who ran for 173 yards against the Bungles in his first NFL start, then disappeared until running for 227 against them again. . . . The Seahawks have been successful once in their last 21 third-down plays, proving once again that you can have billions, like owner Paul Allen, and still be a loser. OK, a well-off loser.

DO NOT BE ALARMED

After investigation, that loud groan heard Sunday evening roaring across the western part of the United States was found to have emanated from Las Vegas, and was in direct response to Young’s taking a knee to end the game with the Saints.

To review: The 49ers were beating the Saints by 11 points with 1:22 remaining. Those betting on the 49ers, however, had to give the Saints 13 1/2 points, so San Francisco was losing.

New Orleans tried an onside kick, but Terry Kirby returned it inside the Saint five. Young handed the ball to Garrison Hearst on the next play, who plowed to the one. It was time for the betting public to get rich.

The 49ers retreated to the huddle, Hearst said later he was eager to run again, “because I wanted to score.”

But Young told his teammates the sporting thing to do was just take a knee and run out the clock. It could not be confirmed, of course, but Rice probably was screaming: “Throw me the ball! Throw me the ball!”

Young took a knee and those bettors who’d thought they were living right were left with a story of lament.

COMEBACK PLAYER OF THE YEAR

* Dallas running back Emmitt Smith. The consensus last summer was that Smith was finished, but he has gone over the 1,000-yard mark for the eighth consecutive year and has the Cowboys talking Super Bowl again.

* Buffalo quarterback Doug Flutie. Rob Johnson started the season for the Bills, who opened 0-3, and now they’re thick into the playoff hunt with the little guy.

* Minnesota quarterback Randall Cunningham. He’s so much calmer, so much more in command of his play, so fortunate Brad Johnson got hurt and hurt again.

COMEBACK PLAYER OF THE CENTURY

After opening his career 0-7 and looking like a lifetime backup to Ryan Leaf, who got more than $11 million to sign and play right away, Craig Whelihan hung in there and now has won two games in succession.

Ryan who?

DISAPPOINTMENT OF THE YEAR

* Tampa Bay quarterback Trent Dilfer. He said before the season there would be two or three games in which his team needed him to step up and make the big play, Instead, he has faltered each time when asked to save the day.

* Detroit quarterback Scott Mitchell. He became a footnote almost overnight, and with the development of rookie Charlie Batch, will be pitching elsewhere.

* Kansas City Coach Marty Schottenheimer. He lowered his standards to win, bringing in questionable character in Chester McGlockton and Bam Morris to go with Andre Rison and Derrick Thomas. And he’s paid for it, his own reputation suffering.

AN EYE FOR TALENT

Jim Schwantz has played special teams for the Dallas Cowboys, now he’s employed by the Chicago Bears, and he notices a difference.

“I think we have better character guys than they had in Dallas,” Schwantz said. “But it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to tell we don’t have the talent of other teams.”

DOMINATING, BABY

Raider Coach Jon Gruden, saying what most everyone else is thinking these days in the NFL about Denver running back Terrell Davis, “I’ve seen a lot of great backs, but this guy is Superman right now.”

THANKS FOR NOTHING

Pittsburgh defender Dewayne Washington had a career day, intercepting Mark Brunell passes and returning them 52 and 78 yards for touchdowns that helped defeat Jacksonville.

Asked about Washington’s play, Pittsburgh Coach Bill Cowher didn’t exactly nominate him for the Pro Bowl.

“It’s poetic justice,” he said. “For a guy that has had more balls go through his hands through the course of the season--he could be leading the league in interceptions and maybe scoring.”

It wouldn’t be a surprise to learn later that Cowher awarded him a game ball--choosing to hand it to him rather than flipping it to him.

NOV. 22, 1998

For the first time this NFL season someone said: “Our backs are against the wall”-- Pittsburgh wide receiver Charles Johnson.

Just where is this wall?