Don’t Expect Jerry to Get on This Bus

The advertisement on the side of an L.A. city bus for the soon-to-be-released Universal Pictures and Imagine Entertainment movie “Bowfinger” was altered last week by someone who obviously is talented with a paintbrush.

The tag line “Loser Faker, Trouble Maker” was altered to read “Loser Laker.”

“The hoax was pulled off with expert precision, causing studio executives to question if professionals were somehow involved,” a Universal publicist wrote in a press release.

As Claude Rains would order, “Round up the usual suspects.”

1. Will Perdue. Insulted because he’s the only former Bull who played under Phil Jackson who hasn’t been mentioned as a future Laker.

2. Shaquille O’Neal. Seldom if ever leaves the paint any more.

3. Paul Westhead, Randy Pfund, Del Harris and Kurt Rambis. Like in Agatha Christie’s “Murder on the Orient Express,” all of the offended parties conspired to seek revenge.

4. Nick Van Exel. Had some time to kill while waiting for the bus to Cancun.

5. Dennis Rodman. He’s right. He gets blamed for everything.

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Larry Rummans, the retired L.A. boxing promoter who turns 89 in September, compares “Hurricane” Peter McNeeley to Jack Dempsey. . . .

“McNeeley’s voice is high, just like Dempsey’s,” Rummans said. . . .

He made that observation during Tuesday’s news conference at the Hollywood Athletic Club to publicize Saturday night’s card at Las Vegas’ Mandalay Bay. . . .

The main event is the World Boxing Assn. bantamweight title fight between Johnny Tapia and Paulie Ayala, but the undercard featuring McNeeley vs. Butterbean and Mia St. John vs. “Scary” Mary Ann Haik is attracting more attention. . . .

Fifty years ago this week, Rummans promoted the fight at Gilmore Stadium between Jersey Joe Walcott and Joey Maxim. . . .

Frank Sinatra put up the money. . . .

The truth about the truce between Bob Arum and Don King? . . .

On the recent tour to promote the Sept. 18 welterweight fight between Oscar De La Hoya and Felix Trinidad, Arum became exasperated when King, Trinidad and entourage were one hour late for a news conference in Las Vegas and an hour and a half late for one at Universal Studios. . . .

“I’m just glad I don’t have to see their ugly faces again, all of them, until the week of the fight,” Arum said. . . .

Andre Agassi’s coach, Brad Gilbert, told Jim Rome that Jelena Dokic has “the craziest father you’ve ever seen.” . . .

Considering some of the crazy tennis fathers, that’s saying a lot. . . .

Someday, when Dokic is going for her fourth or fifth Grand Slam title, we’ll look back and realize that her victory over Martina Hingis wasn’t that much of an upset. . . .

Angel General Manager Bill Bavasi hasn’t ruled out the possibility that he will trade Chuck Finley if it’s apparent in July that the team is going nowhere. . . .

But the scenario some are imagining that Finley would return to the Angels in the off-season as a free agent is not one they should count on. . . .

For one thing, no team is likely to relinquish any players the Angels would want for him if they believe he is merely a rent-a-player. . . .

For another, Finley, as much as he enjoys living in Southern California, might be wowed by the baseball environment in another locale and decide to remain there. . . .

That’s what happened with Mark McGwire, who believed he would sign as a free agent before last season with the Angels until he realized how much he liked playing in front of the enthusiastic fans in St. Louis. . . .

Everyone with even a passing interest in horse racing knows the story of Charismatic, who twice went unclaimed for $62,500 and went on to win the Kentucky Derby and Preakness. . . .

Jeffrey Sengara didn’t make that mistake with Budroyale, one of four horses entered in Sunday’s Sempra Energy Hollywood Gold Cup. The Canadian owner claimed him for $50,000 last year. . . .

Sengara has a problem that many parents of young children might envy. He can’t get his 2-year-old son, Kevin, to watch “Barney” in the mornings. Kevin is satisfied only with tapes of Budroyale’s races. . . .

George Kiseda, a former Timesman, obviously has been watching the NBA finals. . . .

“What rule do the NBA and Alcoholics Anonymous have in common?” he asks. . . .

“Both organizations allow you 12 steps to get where you’re going.”

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While wondering if Toronto’s Fernandez is the Tony you believed would be hitting .400, I was thinking: Mike Piazza’s critics have been quiet lately, let’s hope the referee has enough yellow cards for the U.S. World Cup game against Nigeria, De La Hoya should focus more on chasing Trinidad than Ricky Martin.

Randy Harvey can be reached at his e-mail address: randy.harvey@latimes.com.