Call This Team Black-and-Blues After Playoff Falls

Bernie Miklasz in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: “The Blues, champions of the long and devalued NHL exhibition season, have flunked another playoff test.

“For the 14th consecutive season, they’ve failed to get beyond the second round. For the sixth time since 1986, the Blues couldn’t even reach the second round.

“But this was their most embarrassing and humiliating playoff flop [losing to San Jose]. Because this year was supposed to be different. This was the year the Blues would bust their mediocre pattern and break on through to the other side of the NHL postseason.”

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Trivia time: What is the record for the fastest goal from the start of an NHL playoff game?

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Bay Area bias: Before the lightly regarded Sharks won the seventh game and the series from St. Louis, Art Spander of the Oakland Tribune noted: “The Sharks could have laid down like dogs, as did the Los Angeles Kings, who were swept in four games by the Detroit Red Wings.”

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Season-long trend: Comedy writer Alan Ray in the San Francisco Chronicle on Lenny Wilkens quitting as coach of the Atlanta Hawks:

“His players feel about him the way they shoot basketballs. Most will miss him badly.”

Oh, by the way: Gary Shelton in the St, Petersburg (Fla.) Times: “Juan Antonio Samaranch is already talking tough to Greece, host of the 2004 Games.

“Seems he wants better transportation and better facilities. And a new Rolex wouldn’t hurt, either.”

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ZZZZZ: “Only the NBA,” says Mike Lupica of the New York Daily News, “could turn a five-game, first-round series into the basketball equivalent of ‘Dances With Wolves.’ ”

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The Carter plan: Dan Le Batard in the Miami Herald: “Patrick Ewing dunked really hard against Toronto on Sunday, only to be sued by Raptor Coach Butch Carter for ‘being really mean.’ ”

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Trick shot: When Neville Rowlanson, 56, teed off on the first hole on a golf course in Suffolk, England, his drive struck a tee-box marker, ricocheted to the right, scooted 25 yards onto the 18th green, hit the pin, and disappeared into the cup.

Golf World magazine called the feat a “course-in-one.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1966, Boston edged the Lakers, 95-93, in Game 7 of the championship series, giving the Celtics eight consecutive NBA titles.

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Trivia answer: Don Kozak of the Kings scored at the six-second mark against Boston on April 17, 1977. Los Angeles won, 7-4.

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And finally: Last week, at the Greater Greensboro Open golf tournament, Justin Leonard noticed a fan outside the ropes with a cell phone to his ear.

Leonard walked over to him, grabbed his ticket and began reading the back of it: “Cellular phones, cameras, coolers, pets and signs are prohibited,” Leonard read.

It is not known whether the chastised fan hung up.