Trash Talking Definitely Not Swimmers’ Strong Suit

Indianapolis, you’re no Sacramento.

I mean, aside from the bland architecture, bland night life, bland restaurants, bland hotels, sweltering summer weather and stultifying boredom in between preliminary heats, the host cities for the U.S. Olympic swim and track and field trials have absolutely nothing in common.

Indianapolis is halfway through the swim trials and where is the trash talk? Where are the on-camera staredowns, the in-front-of-the- microphone insolence, the “I am gonna take out Tom Malchow!” chest-thumping?

Sadly, it is nowhere to be found in and around the Indiana Natatorium, despite the best efforts of sportswriters grappling with the throes of post-Michael-versus-Maurice withdrawal.

A few of them cornered Aaron Peirsol the other day to grill the Irvine teenager about his 200-meter backstroke victory over world-record holder Lenny Krayzelburg at last month’s Janet Evans Invitational at USC and whether he would be calling out Krayzelburg with a declaration of full-scale nautical war.

” Hey,” Peirsol said sheepishly, “I don’t want to turn this into . . . “

Reporter, eager, hopeful, interrupting: “Maurice Greene and Michael Johnson?”

Peirsol: “Yeah. I don’t want to turn it into that.”

Reporter: “Well, we do have Dara and Jenny.”

Peirsol, smiling: “Yeah. That’s more fun to watch.”

Dara Torres and Jenny Thompson--now this is a feud begging for prime-time exposure. Unlike Greene-vs.-Johnson, nothing about their rivalry has been contrived. Theirs is a legitimate turf (surf?) war--with Thompson the reigning sprint queen of U.S. swimming, former owner of the world record in the women’s 100-meter butterfly, and Torres, now 33, coming out of a seven-year retirement to challenge Thompson in one of her premier events.

They used to train together before Coach Richard Quick had to separate them and schedule them into different workout sessions. According to various reports, it was either that or hire a security guard for their daily practice sessions at the Stanford pool.

Alas, when confronted with cameras and tape recorders, female swimmers respond differently than male 200-meter sprinters. So instead of clenched teeth and fists after their 100-meter butterfly final Thursday night, Thompson and Torres hugged in the water. Of course, Thompson had just outtouched Torres for the victory and Torres had just qualified for her fourth Olympic team, so this was a rare instance in which both competitors had reason to smile.

And smile they did, wherever a photographic lens may roam. It was politeness overload, the decorum broken only when Torres took a seat during Thompson’s interview session. When someone asked if they could sustain a friendship while competing in the same event, Thompson spotted Torres in the room and seemed unnerved, hemming and hawing her way through an awkward politically correct reply.

Um, yes, they were still friends and, um, no, it hasn’t been easy, and, um, Torres’ presence has actually been good for Thompson because it knocked her out of her “comfort zone” and forced her to become better.

So, the Thompson-Torres feud appears to be surviving Indianapolis without eruption, escalation or an invitation to step outside the pool.

On the hopeful side, they’ll always have Sydney.

TURN 33, SWIM FAST, GET GRILLED

This is the state of Olympic competition, circa summer 2000:

Torres, a veteran of the 1984 Los Angeles Games, returns to swimming after a seven-year absence, sets an American record in the 100-meter butterfly prelims and becomes the second American female swimmer to qualify for four Olympics--a rousing good comeback story, on the face of it.

But Torres is 33, a veritable Methuselah amid the chlorine kiddies, so she and her coach were asked by a reporter if her fast times at such an advanced age shouldn’t arouse suspicion of chemical enhancement, a la Michelle Smith, the 1996 Olympic swim champion now serving a lifetime doping ban.

Torres’ coach quickly intercepted the query.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” Quick began, “I want to tell you if I ever thought there was any athlete of mine who was possibly cheating, I wouldn’t coach them for one more second.

“I’d like to think we’re on the cutting edge of what can be done nutritionally. You can achieve like you’re a steroid athlete--it just takes a longer time and a lot of hard work.”

Neither Quick nor Torres would divulge what these super-nutritional supplements might be, although it does make the mind spin a bit. Creatine cookies? Geritol-laced power shakes, followed by wheatgrass-and-prune juice chasers?

Torres dismissed the speculation of illicit enhancement, saying, “This is actually the first meet where anyone has ever mentioned it to me. I think Richard can tell you about my workout sessions and how I train. I think there are three words to describe where I am now: hard work, dedication and sacrifice.”

Actually, that’s four words, but, you know, after training on the cutting edge of nutrition, you always want to give 110%.

“I feel like I’ve done everything I absolutely can the right way to get where I am,” she said. “I guess it seems amazing because I’m 33 and did not swim for seven years. For some reason, this is supposed to happen and I’m enjoying the ride.”

Barring illness or injury between now and the Sydney Games, Torres will become the first American female swimmer to actually compete in four Olympics. Jill Sterkel also qualified for four Olympic teams but did not participate in the 1980 Moscow Games because of the U.S. boycott.

Torres retired from competitive swimming after the 1992 Olympics, having won gold medals in Los Angeles and Barcelona along with a silver and a bronze in Seoul in 1988. She sat out the 1996 Atlanta Games, believing she was done with the sport for good.

“This is how much it wasn’t in my mind,” she said. “I went to the ’96 games to watch like a spectator. I went to all the other events except swimming. I didn’t know who was swimming or what was going on. I had no desire to watch swimming or be involved in swimming in any capacity. I never thought about getting back into the water.”

With the lure of another Olympics proving irresistible, she ended her retirement in July 1999--and, barely 12 months later, had qualified for another Summer Games.

“When I got out of the pool [after Thursday’s 100 butterfly final], I had to pinch myself to make sure it wasn’t a dream,” she said. “It’s so hard to describe.”

Torres swam in her first Olympics at 17.

“This one, by far, is so much sweeter,” she said. “I think when you are 17 years old, you can’t really appreciate it as much. The fact that I’m a little more mature and have more perspective on it, there’s a completely different feeling going into it.”

THORPEDO FODDER?

Eighteen-year-old Klete Keller had just broken a 12-year-old American record, swimming 3:47.18 to win the men’s 400-meter freestyle final at the trials, and was basking in the moment until an Australian journalist tossed a wet blanket over the euphoria.

The writer asked Keller if he realized, “You’re still 11 meters behind Ian Thorpe?”

Knowing Keller, no, he probably didn’t.

Keller, born in Rancho Cucamonga, trains in Phoenix, where he is known affectionately in swimming circles as something of a space cadet. Listed on the personal resume Keller will take with him to Sydney:

* Once fell into the walrus pit at Sea World.

* Once got lost during a tour of Alcatraz.

* More recently, got lost and locked inside a zoo during a swim team trip to Australia, requiring officials to unlock the gates and search the premises for him.

* Smacked head-first into an ocean buoy during an open-water competition last year.

All of which is probably a good thing for Keller, who specializes in the same events--the 200 and 400 freestyle--as Australia’s already-legendary Thorpe, the world-record holder in both events.

When thrown into the same Olympic pool as the Thorpedo, being oblivious to one’s surroundings can only be an asset.

HOLLOW LAND

Yes, everything you have heard about Indianapolis is true. An Oregon man, with a daughter competing at the trials this week, said he received a letter from a friend after hearing that his daughter would be heading to Indianapolis in August.

Inside was a sheet of paper with the heading, “Things To Do In Indianapolis.”

The rest of the page was blank.

Of course, this is the kind of atmosphere swim coaches want when trying to keep the minds of teenagers and young adults focused on the competition in the pool. Breaststroker Ed Moses said he feels like he has been trapped in a cocoon during the trials. No distractions, no extracurricular excitement, no threat of danger or injury, except for the sharp metal bed frame that sliced the foot of 100-meter backstroker Bobby Brewer and knocked him out of the final.

The accident left swim coach Dave Salo, who has trained Brewer, shaking his head and lamenting, “I’m going to have more swimmers in the hospital than in the Olympics.”

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Staff Writer Lisa Dillman contributed to this column.