A Kinder, Gentler Version of the Bronx Bombers

Bernie Lincicome in the Rocky Mountain News, on the new image of the New York Yankees:

“America may not love these Yankees, but no one really hates them anymore. To hate the Yankees today is to hate Derek Jeter, the splendid young shortstop, or Paul O’Neill, the edgy and wounded gamer in right field, or Bernie Williams, the thoroughly decent center-field heir of DiMaggio and Mantle, or that contorting emblem of freedom, El Duque.

“It is to hate Don Zimmer, baseball’s pool toy. To hate these Yankees is to hate Joe Torre, a constitutional impossibility.”

*

Trivia time: What is the NCAA Division I-A record for most yards gained by both teams in a game?

*

Tongue in cheek: David Whitley of the Orlando, Fla., Sentinel, on the media blowing things out of proportion:

“No doubt, too big a deal has been made of Clemens vs. Piazza. Just as too big a deal was made of John Rocker’s ranting, Al Gore’s fibbing and Lady Di’s death. All of which were the media’s fault.”

*

Uncomfortable career: Ski-movie producer Warren Miller, 75, announcing his retirement after heralding each ski season with a new film:

“You can only ski while looking back through your legs and filming a skier chasing you for so long.”

*

Bet on Lemmon: Greg Cote of the Miami Herald, writing before the Rams were blitzed, 54-34, by the Kansas City Chiefs:

“Watching a Rams game is like watching the U.S. invade Grenada. It just doesn’t seem fair. It’s like watching Mike Tyson fight Jack Lemmon.”

*

One will do: Detroit Piston forward Cedric Ceballos reported out of shape, but insisted, “You can put 1,000 people on me and I will still score.”

*

Looking back: On this day in 1939, UCLA defeated Oregon, 16-6, at the Coliseum. The Bruins had an undefeated season marred by four ties, an NCAA record that the Bruins still share with two other schools.

*

Trivia answer: 1,563 yards--Houston, 827, and Texas Christian, 736, on Nov. 3, 1990.

*

And finally: The late Steve Schoenfeld, a senior writer for CBS SportsLine, enjoyed telling a story about former San Diego Charger Coach Don Coryell’s single-minded approach to football.

“Once on a game day, Coryell’s wife asked him to put the trash in the trunk and take it down the driveway to the curb on his way to the game. He arrived at the stadium with trash cans sticking out of the car trunk.”