An athlete can’t lose that hunger

Maybe you’ve gotten your fill of Takeru Kobayashi.

Apparently so has the satirical website TheOnion.com, which last week “reported” the eating champion’s retirement.

“Mere hours after eating what he claims to be his ‘farewell meal’ Tuesday, longtime consumer of comestible goods Takeru Kobayashi formally announced that, after a career that has spanned nearly his entire lifetime, he has decided to walk away from eating food.

“ ‘My physical gifts, including my God-given ability to ingest food, are still there, but my passion for it is not,’ said a gaunt, visibly fatigued Kobayashi, speaking through his interpreter in a barely audible whisper. ‘Yes, chewing and swallowing food has always played an important part in my life, and if I’d never done it, I probably wouldn’t be here today. But after nearly 30 years, I am tired of eating.

“ ‘I used to eat because I wanted to, but lately it seems like I only do it because I feel like I have to,’ added Kobayashi, who claims that he was in the middle of eating his 52nd barbecue chicken wing last week when he realized he no longer possessed the same hunger he did earlier in his career. ‘I knew it was time to step aside and give others the chance to eat.’ ”

Trivia time

Dodgers great Sandy Koufax once pitched to the star of a popular 1960s TV series. In the episode featuring Koufax, the star of the series hit a home run, ran around the bases and slid into home plate.

Who was this famous TV star?

Spend it like Posh

We honestly don’t have anything against Victoria Beckham, but the material just keeps coming.

A website called SeenOn.com identifies products seen on celebrities as well as on film and TV, referring people to sites where they can purchase the items.

Among the 65 items worn or carried by Victoria Beckham:

Jimmy Choo foldover calfskin clutch, $1,250.

Yves Saint Laurent Tribute Mary Jane Shoes, $660.

Christian Louboutin Yoyo Zeppa Slingbacks, $640.

And of course ...

Dodgers jacket from MLB.com, $109.99.

Um, uh ...

Several newspapers are considering a boycott of NFL games because of a rule that would require photographers to wear vests with prominent logos for league sponsors Canon and Reebok, the Chicago Tribune reported.

Said George de Lama, the Tribune’s managing editor for news: “We cannot abide by this. We don’t work for the NFL. Our photographers, just like our writers, are there covering games on behalf of our readers. We will talk to our colleagues in Tribune Co. and elsewhere in the industry.”

We’re just glad we don’t have any silly NFL team.

A stiff upper lip

Bias comes in many forms, the website for the American Mustache Institute intones.

“And the end of the 1970s marked a significant turn -- and began a dark period of discrimination against mustached Americans.”

In its battle against negative stereotyping, AMI is holding a contest to decide the Greatest Sports Mustache of All Time.

Among the nominees: former pitchers Al Hrabosky, Rollie Fingers and Goose Gossage, and Hall of Fame basketball player Walt “Clyde” Frazier.

Trivia answer

The talking horse, Mr. Ed.

Thanks to reader Eddie Deezen for the question.

And finally

Let’s hear once more from The Onion -- also one of the few food items we never heard mention of Kobayashi cramming.

“Despite his family members pleading with him at his bedside to reconsider his decision, Kobayashi maintains that he ‘[does] not want to become one of those washed-up guys who doesn’t know when to quit and ends up having to eat through a straw.’ ”

--

robyn.norwood@latimes.com