Gastineau Serves Up Quick Rebuttal

The participants in today’s Toyota pro/celebrity race at Long Beach were being introduced at a press breakfast Friday.

“When you go into a bar with Mark Gastineau, you get served quick,” M.C. Bruce Flanders said.

Said a voice from the rear: “Not at Studio 54, you don’t!”

The voice belonged to Gastineau. The All-Pro defensive end of the New York Jets was convicted of assault after an incident at Studio 54 last year.

Larry Holmes, looking ahead after his fight with Michael Spinks, said he would like to give Marvis Frazier another shot.

Thinking it over, he said: “Maybe I’ll fight Joe Frazier first, then Marvis. I can never forget the time Joe broke my ribs when I was his sparring partner. I never told him, but he knew I was hurt, and he still didn’t give me a day off.”

Pitcher Bill Lee, after being released by the Phoenix Giants, said he didn’t know if he would return to Canada, where he was living.

“They don’t play enough baseball there,” he said. “I loved Venezuela. The fans loved me down there. Down there, beers are $3 for 24. Gas is 11 cents a gallon. If you like to drink beer and drive, it’s great.”

Add Lee: Recalling his days with the Boston Red Sox, he said: “Tom Yawkey liked me. He appreciated what I did. Mrs. Yawkey couldn’t stand me. When you associate yourself with the old man, and when Caesar is dead, you might as well head to Alexandria with his corpse.” Might as well.

For What It’s Worth: Gene Sarazen, 83, and Sam Snead, 72, played a ceremonial nine holes before the start of the Masters. Sarazen shot a 41, Snead a 39.

Both scores bettered the 43 shot by former British Open champion Bill Rogers.

Would-you-believe-it dept.: Lee Trevino has forever maintained that his game isn’t suited to Augusta National, but in the first Masters he played, in 1968, he was only two shots out of the lead after 54 holes. A final-round 80 did him in.

That was the Masters in which Roberto de Vicenzo signed an incorrect scorecard, giving the win to Bob Goalby.

If the price is right, Roberto Duran said he would like to fight the winner of the Marvin Hagler-Tommy Hearns fight. He won’t attend the fight, however.

The reason? Vanity.

From Panama, he said: “I don’t want the North American fans to see me as fat as I am, since I weigh 200 pounds.”

Announcer Frank Glieber, on Chicago Bears Coach Mike Ditka: “I remember when he played and coached for the Cowboys. He was such a fitness nut. Every morning, he would go to the window at his dorm room, open it, take a deep breath . . . and then climb inside.”

Quotebook

Former middleweight champion Jake LaMotta, who took his sixth wife this week, on an earlier wife: “She always complained she didn’t have anything to wear. I never believed her until I saw her pictures in Playboy.”