DISTINGUISHED ABSENTEES

Nominees Paul Newman (best actor), Woody Allen (best director) and Michael Caine (best supporting actor) won’t be attending the live 6 p.m. ABC-TV broadcast of the Oscar ceremonies from the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion. Newman is sitting them out because he has never won, and Caine is locked into “Jaws 4” filming. Allen, who never attends the show, will be playing his clarinet with the New Orleans Marching and Funeral Band at Michael’s Pub on Manhattan’s East Side--exactly what he was doing in 1977 when he won writing and directing Oscars for “Annie Hall.” Says Allen: “When you see who the winners of these things are, you realize how meaningless they are.”