DJ Finds the Groove and Has Boston Rockin’ and Rollin’

Just when you think Boston Celtic Mystique is a cheap cologne . . .

Just when you think you know a little bit about basketball, mathematics, momentum, parapsychology, medical science, players from BYU and destiny . . .

Celtics 109, Lakers 103.

Put a hold on that parade, Los Angeles. Don’t shred the confetti or blow up the balloons, even if you get an OK from Jack Kent Cooke. All bets, theories, logical explanations and vacation plans are off.

The Celtics are back.

And guess where it happened?

Boston Garden was an unfriendly place for the Lakers Sunday, right from the start. The Celtics were introduced in grand style as they took the court, naturally. The Lakers were completely ignored.

Then, you know that infamous parquet floor of the Garden? The dead spots on the floor? They turned out to be Lakers.

As the Lakers slowly wilted in the Garden heat, Boston fans recorded a new album, “Live: Celtic Fans’ Greatest Chants,” featuring such sure-fire hits as “BEAT L.A.,” “GO HOME, JACK (Nicholson),” and, once the Celtics had the game in hand, “SWEEP THIS .”

It was an ugly day, a Celtic kind of day. The fans were ugly and the Celtic heroes were three guys who feature what playground jive critics would call ugly games--Greg Kite, Dennis Johnson and Larry Bird. Kite is King Ugly Game, of course, but Bird and DJ win no Michael Jordan swoop-alike contests.

Those three Celtics are slow, and none of them leap tall buildings at a single bound, or even squatty buildings like the Boston Garden.

But Sunday they got the Celtics back into the NBA Finals. They had help. The ghosts that the Lakers supposedly exorcised in winning the NBA title in the Garden in ’85 sneaked back in.

“We do like the confines of here,” Dennis Johnson said, referring to the ancient Garden. “We got a real big lift from the fans.”

The fans got a real big lift from Dennis Johnson, too. He scored 26 points and had 7 rebounds, which is real good for a 32-year-old, 10-year veteran widely rumored to be wearing out, or burning out.

When the Celtics came from nine down in the second quarter, making a 30-17 run, DJ made five jumpers and scored on a drive.

When the Lakers needed to get out fast at the start of the fourth quarter, DJ stuck two quick jumpers.

He also hit a key three-point bomb in the third quarter, carved up the middle of the Laker defense with drives in the fourth, and pulled down some key rebounds, including three on offense.

If you’re the Lakers, you hate to see that.

DJ scored a meek 7 points in Game 1 and a harmless 20 in Game 2. Sunday, in Game 3, he hurt the Lakers. Killed ‘em. He worked the cracks and seams in the Lakers’ double-teaming, rotating defense, which Sunday rotated about as quickly as the tires on your car.

Asked if the Laker defense was as aggressive in Game 3, Johnson said, “They really wasn’t. They weren’t rotating as fast. They were doubling and they weren’t getting back out to the open man. And we were making the extra pass.”

DJ is a friendly man, he works hard to accommodate the media and to cut the media some slack, so he didn’t lash out when someone mentioned how lousy he shot the first two games. During Game 2, Johnson hit five shots in a row.

Johnson politely shrugged.

“Every great now and then, I can shoot a couple,” he said evenly.

The Lakers are aware of this. Johnson knocked the Lakers out of the 1978 playoffs in the first round with a last-second home-run jumper. He played the Lakers tough when he was in Phoenix, and even tougher as a Celtic.

They know he is the wrong man to leave open, even for an instant, 17 feet from the basket with the ball.

What happened Sunday certainly didn’t surprise DJ. It didn’t surprise the Celtics.

Hey, the Celtics weren’t seeded into the finals. They beat the best teams in the East to get here. Injuries and all, they’re the very best competition the league could line up for the Lakers.

And they were home. Since losing to the Lakers in the sixth game of the 1985 finals, the Celtics are 94-3 on the home boards.

Mystique? Near the end of the second quarter, score tied, Bird shot a jumper that clanged on the front rim, bounced high and dropped through the net. A DJ jumper early in the second half did the same.

Down the stretch, a key slam-dunk by James Worthy was rejected by the leprechaun who sits on the rim. The little man also slapped away several other Worthy shots, and the leprechaun’s defense on Laker three-point shot attempts was superb.

All this was not supposed to happen. The Celtics were beaten, battered, whipped, run down, embarrassed. There was bickering among the players, talk of some guys dogging. The machine had broken down.

A sweep was the Lakers’ destiny. Even leading the series, 2-0, they were hungry, determined. One loss, even one, would tarnish their bid for immortality.

Magic, Michael Cooper, Coach Pat Riley and a couple other Lakers tried to get themselves in the right frame of mind Saturday by going to watch “The Untouchables.”

But Sunday, in DJ and Bird, the Lakers ran into the Unsweepables.

Please understand, it can’t happen again. It was a one-game fluke. You realize that if you know anything about basketball, mathematics, momentum. . . .