Colorful Play-by-Play Announcer : No Retirement for Big 5’s Former Voice

Les Keiter is lounging in an easy chair at his Kailua condo. His cat, Too Much, sprawls on his lap.

Keiter has just been asked to do an impromptu basketball broadcast. For the next 30 seconds, he might as well be in Madison Square Garden in New York . . . or the Palestra in Philadelphia . . . or Blaisdell Arena.

“That’s easy,” he says, going into his spiel:

‘Tickles the Twine’

“Now the St. Joe Hawks bring the ball up the court, moving left to right. It’s passed inside to Steve Carton. Ten feet out . . . He tickles the twine!”

In the air; in the bucket; he tickles the twine. The phrases are Keiter originals.

The names of the players come from deep in Keiter’s past. They played in Philadelphia 20 years ago when Keiter was the voice of Big 5 basketball.

The Big 5--it’s not a conference, but a rivalry between five Philadelphia colleges, LaSalle, Penn, St. Joe’s, Temple and Villanova--recently invited Keiter to return as guest speaker at a luncheon to kick off the Big 5 Hall of Fame induction ceremonies.

“He’s a big part of the lore of Big 5 basketball,” said Frank Bertucci, sports information director at LaSalle University. “Every once in a while, you still hear one of his phrases . . . properly credited to him, of course.”

‘A Cult Following’

“Les is probably the most colorful play-by-play announcer we ever had,” said Dan Baker, the Big 5 executive director. “A lot of us who grew up in the ‘60s loving Big 5 basketball still remember many of Les’ favorite phrases. And there’s still a lot of interest in him. He practically has a cult following here.”

Among the phrases:

--Ring-tailed howitzer: The all-time Keiter trademark. “Basketball coaches ask me about it at banquets,” he said. “What’s a ring-tailed howitzer? It’s an off-balance, crazy shot from 20 feet out that happens to go in.”

--In again, out again Finnegan: That’s a basketball shot when the ball rolls around the rim, seems to dip into the basket, but spins out.

--He strrrrrruck him ouuuut: “In baseball, when a batter strikes out, you have to stick in about six r’s and stretch it ouuuut,” said Keiter.

--He beat the ball. He beat the ball. He beat the ball: That’s when a base runner steals a base and is safe in a close play.

--Boom! Off the wall: That’s a line drive that bounces off the outfield wall as the runner goes for extra bases.

--Wave the shillelagh: Swing that bat.

‘Clones of Today

“I’ve never been able to contain my excitement,” Keiter said. “That’s the biggest problem I had doing television play-by-play. I couldn’t sound like the clones of today. So many of us who were in radio in the old days had to switch to television and it gave us a real problem. We had to try to switch, to pull back.”

Keiter’s style won him many fans, but has also been criticized for his cliched phrases and over-dramatic delivery.

Like his style or not, the man has been courtside, ringside or in the booth at some of the most notable sporting events of our time. He says he’s writing a book about his career.

Philadelphia was Keiter’s last stop before he returned to Honolulu--after a 20-year absence--in 1970. He came back to the islands, where he had done re-creation of major-league games for two years, to get away from the life of a sportscaster.

He bought an ad agency, but it wasn’t long before he was doing a stint on the morning Aku radio show . . . and a little high school football. Then it was reading the scores on the 6 o’clock Channel 2 News . . . and doing University of Hawaii basketball games . . . and Hawaii Islander baseball games.

Today, he does the news at 6 and 10 on weekdays, and Don King is talking about signing him to call another fight.