He Didn’t Strike Out Again, but Change His Name to Mighty Corky

Mighty Casey, who struck out in a famous baseball poem, got another chance in a contest sponsored by “Spitball,” a literary baseball magazine in Cincinnati, in which people were invited to write parodies of “Casey at the Bat.”

This time he homered, but . . .

The contest was to celebrate the 100th anniversary of Ernest Thayer’s poem which ends with the well-known line, “There is no joy in Mudville, mighty Casey has struck out.”

In a parody written by Eugene Flinn, God (“a baseball fan”) agrees to give Casey and his Mudville team a second chance against a team of all-stars, now all saints in heaven. St. Dizzy Dean pitches to Casey. And, to be fair, God umpires.

It seems that “Heaven’s righted a mistake,” when Casey homers to give Mudville the win, but as Casey rounds the bases, “God examines Casey’s broken bat.”

“Suddenly the cheering stops, it’s quiet as a prayer.

“God holds the bat aloft and gently shakes it in the air.

“Somewhere, folks are happy to be where the action’s at.

“But there is no joy in Mudville, mighty Casey corked his bat.”

Your ID, please: If you want to buy a beer at Philadelphia’s Veterans Stadium for a Phillies game, you have to show proof that you’re 21 years old. Even on Old Timers Day.

The fans aren’t pleased. Especially the older ones.

“My wife would think it’s a compliment, but I’m insulted,” said Jim Sunderhauf, an engineer from Turnersville, N.J. “I’m 34. I think it’s pretty ridiculous.”

No more ridiculous than asking Phil Walker, 54, for his ID.

“He (the vendor) embarrassed the hell out of me,” Walker said. “I’m getting to be an old man, maybe ready to stop drinking. And I get questioned for a beer?”

Vendors don’t like the idea, either.

“Lots of people get angry when forced to produce an ID,” a vendor said. “Angry people don’t tip.”

Sounds Logical: When Morganna, the Kissing Bandit with measurements of 60-23-29, bussed two Houston Astros’ players on the sidelines a few years back, the team first filed charges, then dropped them when they heard her lawyer’s argument.

“Morganna leaned over the railing for a foul ball,” he said, “and gravity took its toll. She fell out on the field.”

Speed pays off: Rick Mears earned $4,024 each time he made a lap around Indianapolis Motor Speedway in winning the Indy 500.

Sandra Spuzich has made a hole-in-one in the Lady Keystone Open for three straight years on three different par-3 holes, a feat unparalleled in professional golf.

If she can make it 4 for 4 next week with an ace on the 165-yard 17th hole at Hershey, Pa., Country Club, tournament director Dick Anzolut will present her with a check for $100,000. In 26 years on the LPGA tour, the most Spuzich ever made in a single year was $89,822.

Spuzich, 51, aced the 160-yard fifth hole in 1985, the 175-yard 12th in 1986 and the 174-yard eighth hole last year.

Quotebook

San Diego Padres’ second baseman Tim Flannery: “Dick Williams was the best manager I ever played for, but I wouldn’t have him over for dinner.”