Considering that Southern California is hardly Iowa,...

Considering that Southern California is hardly Iowa, it’s a bit strange to be wallowing in pig stories these days.

First there is Grunt, the porker who was abandoned on the Palos Verdes Peninsula and then given a reprieve when 40 people offered to adopt him. The Animal Control Shelter in Carson is awaiting results of the pig’s blood test to determine if he has any diseases. If Grunt is given a clean bill of health, he will soon be rooting away on an Ojai ranch.

Meanwhile, a special breed of Chinese potbellied pigs who live at Kayla Mull’s Creatures of Comfort ranch in Norco have received the Golden Collar Award. The honor is given to the best new pet of the year by a consumer publication called Pet Care Report, which noted: “Finally there’s a pet that won’t hog the bed. Chinese potbellied pigs are friendly, relaxed and can be housebroken.”

Mull began importing the pigs from Sweden in 1983. Her own pets, Hamlet and Pigtail, play piano, ride skateboards and type. But what really sets the breed apart is that fully grown, they stand only 18 inches tall and weigh 100 to 150 pounds, compared to 250 pounds and up for other pigs. But while their stature may be miniature, their cost isn’t: $1,500 to $5,000.

The Doris Day Animal League held an unusual home tour Thursday in Beverly Hills. Called the “cruelty-free home,” the fancy two-bedroom condo was equipped with cosmetics and household products created without lab tests on animals. The tour was in support of proposed state legislation that would ban eye irritant tests on animals. The home also featured synthetic rugs, vegetarian foods and, of course, fake furs.

In other action designed to foster more humane treatment of animals, Los Angeles will increase the price of dog and cat breeders’ license fees from $25 to $50 a year starting May 22. The new law is geared to protect animals from “puppy mill”-type kennel operations, said Robert Rush, spokesman for the Department of Animal Regulation. Also, under the law, kennels will be limited to one litter per animal in a 12-month period. No pet under the age of 8 weeks may be sold. Before sale, the animals must be immunized and the seller must provide the buyer with a statement of health and the breeder’s license number.

Those attending a Claremont College lecture Thursday titled “Juggling Jellyfish: History and Hermeneutics in the Qumran Commentaries,” might have been disappointed if they thought they were going to get a lesson in marine biology. George Brooke from the University of Manchester delivered the William H. Brownlee Memorial Lecture. The title referred to the sea scrolls found in the Qumran area of Palestine. Various authors were involved in writing the scrolls, so it was slippery work deciphering the theology--sort of like handling jellyfish, Brooke said.

Forget Spago. A bunch of gluttonous ants have found that the best place to do their power lunching is an intimate hideaway in Temple City--the wire insulation on traffic signals. The plastic insulation apparently emits a smell that may be an ants’ version of pasta with crab sauce. The lunch tab, which the city had to pick up, was $22,000. But Walter Cuk, of Anaheim-based Signal Maintenance Inc., which services traffic lights for 70 cities, says the worst case of the munchies he’s ever seen occurred in the 1950s after Long Beach installed new street signals. The system wouldn’t work, and they found that 4 1/2 miles of cable had been gobbled up by ant gourmands.

The Pet Department, which has four outlets in the Los Angeles area, is offering $1 baths for Chihuahuas today only to celebrate Cinco de Mayo. But Kevin Ryan, a spokesman at the West Hollywood store, noted, “They are an ancient Mexican breed, but we aren’t going to ask that they show proof they were born in Mexico.”

On St. Patrick’s day, the stores gave dollar baths to--you guessed it--Irish setters.