Since He Can’t Communicate, He Just Talks With His Hands

Going from football coach of the Stanford Cardinal to assistant coach of the Milan Seamen sounds like quite a dropoff, but Jack Elway is treating it as a paid vacation in Italy.

As an assistant to old friend Sark Arslanian, formerly the coach at Colorado State, Elway gets $4,200 a month plus expenses and a car to help coach three practices and a game each week. The 12-week season already is under way.

Wrote Jake Curtis of the San Francisco Chronicle: “Among his players are a linebacker who is a dentist and a 38-year-old lineman who is a journalist. Some of the players sip wine before practice and smoke cigarettes during breaks.

“Elway speaks no Italian, so he points a lot. The general manager is available to translate. It makes Elway’s wife chuckle because Elway was criticized for his communication shortcomings with Stanford players when he was fired last fall.”

Easy for him to say: Hall of Famer Ralph Kiner, the New York Mets’ announcer whose bloopers are legendary, recently added these two:

--On a pitch from David Cone: “Right down the middle for ball one.”

--On Philadelphia reliever Steve Bedrosian: “All his saves have come during relief appearances.”

That’s my boy: What do they call Dennis (Oil Can) Boyd’s 2-year-old son? Baby Oil. That’s the truth.

Trivia time: Who was the first manager of the Texas Rangers? (Answer below.)

Now-it-can-be-told Dept.: In a story on the National Football League draft by the Pittsburgh Press, former Pittsburgh Steelers publicist Ed Kiely recalled the 1957 draft when the Steelers, choosing just ahead of the Cleveland Browns, took Len Dawson.

Kiely: “Cleveland was at the table right near us, and Paul Brown knocked his fist on the table and knocked some books off the table. He was so upset because he wanted Dawson. So after a lull, Paul went back to his books--and his pick was Jim Brown.”

Dennis the Menace: Mark Aguirre of the Detroit Pistons, on teammate Dennis Rodman: “There is nobody on any other team who does what he does. He plays defense, rebounds and just changes the game. Nobody changes the game as fast as he does when he comes in.”

Eagle eye: From Philadelphia Eagles Coach Buddy Ryan, after Eastern Division rival Washington obtained Gerald Riggs and Earnest Byner in deals:

On Riggs: “He’s not quite as old as I am.”

On Byner: “That’s good for us, because he’ll fumble.”

Trivia answer: Ted Williams.

Quotebook: LaVell Edwards, BYU football coach, asked whether he likes his receivers to have speed or quickness: “We’d like them to have both, but if they did, they’d be at Southern Cal.”