Golf / Brian Murphy : Seoul Pigeon Poops Out Over Valencia Course

It was the kind of situation that was just oozing with one-line opportunities.

None of which, of course, were lost on Sports Illustrated , which reported the incident in this week’s issue.

Consider the facts: At Valencia Country Club, cart boys Ernie Provencido and Rob Corp stumbled upon a dead pigeon near the course’s driving range. Not so strange, right?

Attached to the pigeon’s leg, however, was a band that read ’88 SEOUL--meaning that the pigeon was one of the 2,400 avifauna that were released during the Summer Games’ opening ceremonies last September, some 6,000 miles away.

Sports Illustrated , of course, noted that “it carried the water” and that it “was the strangest birdie in the 24-year history of the club.”

Jokes aside, the amazing fact remains that somehow, some way, this fowl creature made its way to another hemisphere only to plop dead on the green fairways of Valencia.

“It’s pretty unlikely that it made a transpacific passage on its own,” ornithologist John Trapp of the U.S. Office of Migratory Bird Management told Sports Illustrated . “There are a couple of places, like the Hawaiian Islands, where the bird could have made land while coming across. Or perhaps it was a ship-assisted passage.”

In the meantime, we will refrain from any more one-liners. That’s a gimme.

Swing, swing, swing: Old golfers never die. They just fake their age.

Last weekend at North Ranch Golf Club in Thousand Oaks, a seniors tournament was held for locals. But a few of the aging linksters were apparently not thrilled with the idea of being grouped by age.

The solution?

It was music to their ears. The tournament was arranged into four flights of old bandleaders from the Swing era, appropriately enough. The first flight, for example, was called the Benny Goodman flight.

The second was labeled the Glenn Miller flight, the third the John Osieci flight (a local bandleader) and the fourth the Guy Lombardo flight.

It worked like a charm. Now, while humming a “A String of Pearls,” the seniors could shoot for a string of birdies. And to that four-foot putt that hung on the lip of the cup and refused to go in, they could shout, “Don’t Be That Way.”

Much fun was had, to be sure. When it was over, Paul Sabian won the Goodman flight, Gary Bennett the Miller flight, Sam Green the Osieci flight and George Powlick the Lombardo flight. Paul Ladin was the overall gross winner with a 152 and Boyd O’Donnell was the overall net winner with a 133.

That is, of course, for the record.

Ushering in the future: A name to watch in coming years may be that of Calabasas youngster B. J. Usher.

On Monday, Usher won the 11-and-under age group at the Santa Ana Country Club’s Junior Invitational tournament with a 43 over nine holes. The win was just one in a line of solid tournament performances for Usher.

“The kid comes in first, second or third in every tournament he’s in,” Calabasas Golf and Country Club starter Tom Yamada said.

A story to be continued.

Can we play through?: That blur you might have seen at Oakmont Country Club in La Canada on Aug. 7 was not a runaway golf cart.

That was just Bill and Danna Rountree, who played 36 holes that day in just 3 hours, 50 minutes. Which is, when pondered, an amazingly quick double round.

“It was just a real light Monday,” assistant pro Mark Spinelli said.

No hurry: Golfers at De Bell Golf Course in Burbank may have noticed some changes on the front nine. The course is replacing the greens on Nos. 5 and 9.

In the meantime, golfers must hit onto temporary greens. The work is slated to be finished in October.

From the looks of the wicked bunkers they’re installing at No. 9, however, the wise golfer would not push for an early completion.