These Golfers Can Drive Him Crazy

Some . . . golfers . . . are . . . sooooo . . . slow. To the point that others, such as veteran Lanny Wadkins, are fed up.

“The slow players on the tour are generally selfish,” Wadkins wrote in a column in Golf World. “They play at their speed without regard to anyone else. They don’t care if they’re holding up anyone, they play at their pace come hell or high water.”

Wadkins, regarded as one of the fastest players on the PGA tour, names names--Chip Beck, Larry Mize, David Frost, Billy Mayfair, Bob Estes, Curtis Strange, Bernhard Langer and Tom Purtzer. All guilty, in his eyes.

“I get along with all these guys, but they could stand to play a little faster,” Wadkins said. “Another one is Freddie Couples. He’s a hell of a guy, but he’s slow. . . .

“We have slow-play rules, but the tour seems scared to enforce them. The only thing slower than slow play is getting someone to do something about it.”

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Trivia time: Three NBA coaches from last season played for or coached the same college team in the mid-1960s. Name them and the college. (Hint: one of the three is no longer in the NBA).

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In receivership: As Art Monk of the Washington Redskins bears down on the NFL record for receptions, his career is examined closer. That doesn’t necessarily sit well with Monk, but people search for his identifying mark.

As Ken Denlinger of the Washington Post writes: “If he stays healthy for a few more years, Monk may hold the career-reception mark for quite some time. He seems a first-ballot shoo-in for the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

“Still, it’s hard to find anything unique about Monk. He’s not close to as fast as former Dallas Cowboy Bob Hayes. He’s not close to as stylish as former Pittsburgh Steeler Lynn Swann. He may not even be as dogged as the third-most prolific career catcher, former Oiler, former Bengal and former Charger Charlie Joiner.”

In the end, suggests Redskin receiver coach Charley Taylor, the biggest influence of the 6-foot-3, 209-pound Monk might be something he never could control.

“Notice how teams have gone back to big receivers?” Taylor said. “Al Toon with the Jets. The 49ers’ Jerry Rice. It’s because of Art. He’s bringing that part of it back.”

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Holy cow!This was contributed to Bleacher Banter, a Wrigley Field publication: “We would like to be Harry Caray Krishnas so we can pass out pamphlets in airport bars.”

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Fear at Fenway: From Sean Horgan of the Hartford Courant: “Fenway Park security is having a worse year than the team. Four people ran on the field during the game (Monday), including one moonstruck woman who hugged A’s right fielder Jose Canseco at first and wouldn’t let go until pried away by security. The Red Sox players are starting to get nervous about the ease with which people are getting on the field.”

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Trivia answer: Bill Fitch was the head coach at North Dakota, Jimmy Rodgers was one of his assistants and Phil Jackson was one of the players. Rodgers coaches the Minnesota Timberwolves, Fitch was with the New Jersey Nets before being replaced by Chuck Daly, and Jackson coaches the Chicago Bulls.

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Quotebook: Dennis Erickson, the University of Miami football coach, noting the mental state of his team in the wake of Hurricane Andrew with next Saturday’s opener at Iowa approaching: “If we played Iowa tomorrow, we’d get beat. We’d better get our rear ends in shape if we’re going to play the game, or let’s cancel it.”