Pool Halls Go Upscale and Trendy for the ‘90s

“Kids are being dropped off at pool halls these days,” a friend told me a while back. “It’s now considered to be a safe, wholesome environment for young people.”

“Sure,” I said, “and parents are probably encouraging the little ones to start their own bookmaking businesses as a way to earn extra money after school. And they’re picking the darlings up at the gate when they play hooky, so the kids won’t tire themselves out running from the truant officer.”

My friend just rolled his eyes and suggested that I might be trapped in a cultural vacuum, a situation made worse by my reluctance to watch any movie made after 1963.

A features editor with a popular culture deficiency is like a fisherman with seasickness, a landscaper with agoraphobia or a doctor with typhus.

I decided that it was time to turn away from Robert Preston’s warnings in “The Music Man” and instead tune into Tom Cruise and Paul Newman in “The Color of Money.” Not knowing a cue ball from a bowling bowl, I sent staff writer and wannabe pool shark Jeff Meyers to investigate the state of today’s pool halls.

After an odyssey to a dozen county establishments, Meyers confirmed my friend’s report and also glommed another phenomenon: Pool halls have gone uptown.

“Ventura County has a few toney places with flowers on the bar, no-smoking signs on the wall, rock on the CD and clean bathrooms,” Meyers said. “They attract 20- and 30-year-olds, sell wine and offer a conducive dating environment, games of pool serving as a backdrop for the ritual.”

In our centerpiece, Meyers describes several new pool halls in the county, but traditionalists will be happy to note that Meyers also found a Santa Paula pool hall frozen in the year 1927--a musty, nostalgic joint with original tables.

“I half expected to see Fast Eddie Felson hustling 9-ball at a back table,” Meyers said. “It reminded me of places where I spent too much time and allowance as a kid and lost to a lot of guys named Nicky.”

Meyers spent his Huck Finn years on Long Island and acquired the nom de pool of “Long Island Ice T.” He was known for talking a better game than he played, and his talking was not all that hot. In the last few years, he has become proficient playing on a miniature pool table in his den.

Visiting county pool halls with real tables gave him a chance to sharpen his game. “It’s amazing how fast it all comes back,” Meyers said. “Talc the palms. Dust the tip. Rack ‘em and break. Long Island Ice T rides again.”

Fortunately, his kids have already grown up.

Plenty of local children will be outside this weekend, according to Jane Hulse, our For the Kids columnist. They will be part of the Children’s Celebration of the Arts Festival at Mission Park in Ventura on Saturday.

Local artists and entertainers will offer free workshops in such activities as origami, batik, Middle Eastern dance and kite making. Performers include storytellers, African drummers and the Ventura Klezmer Band.

And not a crap game in sight.