COMMENTARY : Phillies Aren’t Conceding a Thing to Braves in the NL East

There are yuppies now living in the Animal House. Clean-shaven faces have replaced grungy beards. Crew cuts have replaced shoulder-length hair.

My God, they’re even dressing these days in suits, no longer considering a clean pair of blue jeans with no holes a sign of prosperity.

But don’t let the appearance fool you.

The Philadelphia Phillies -- and yes, still defending National League champions -- are back, entering the week sitting atop the N.L. East standings with the best record in baseball.

“Everyone says the Braves are the team to beat in our division,” Phillies General Manager Lee Thomas says, “and rightfully so. But we proved in ’93 we can play with them when we’re healthy, and we proved it again this week.

“We showed the National League East they can be beaten, and we can complete. I don’t see anybody running away from it.”

The swagger may be gone with the departure of John Kruk, Mitch Williams, Danny Jackson, Larry Andersen and Terry Mulholland, but, oh, can they play.

This is a team that completed a four-game sweep over the Braves in Atlanta, the first time that has happened to one of Braves General Manager John Schuerholz’s teams.

It took 11 games for a Phillies starting position player to make an error. And although starters Tommy Greene and Bobby Munoz are injured and Curt Schilling is the only remaining member of the ’93 rotation, their ERA ranked third-best in the league.

“We’re a little quieter than we were in ‘93,” Thomas says, “but I think some of that same confidence is here, the expectation of winning, the belief they can make something happen.”

Who in their wildest imagination could have envisioned Heathcliff Slocumb -- the same guy who was successful in 2 of 11 save situations in his previous four major league seasons -- would have eight saves in eight opportunities entering the week?

Yet it was Phillies Manager Jim Fregosi who believed all along in Slocumb and promised him last season that he would have the chance this year to save games. Voila! Here he is, giving the Phillies the luxury to wait for reliever Norm Charlton.

It’s still silly to believe the Phillies will beat Atlanta for the division title and they may not even finish ahead of the Expos, but it reinforces the belief that Thomas is one of the finest general managers in the game.

Besides, who would have believed they’d win the ’93 pennant?

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Don’t mean to bring up any reminders of those lovely Dick Ravitch, W.J. Usery and Bud Selig revenue-sharing days, but San Francisco Giants third baseman Matt Williams let us know last weekend just what we missed.

When Williams hit two home runs last Friday against the Pittsburgh Pirates, that gave him 62 home runs in his last 160 games, dating back to September 3, 1993.

It sure would have been nice to see last year, wouldn’t it?

Now, with Nashville lawyer Robert Ballow calling the shots, look for the owners to set up another impasse this winter and implement a salary cap or high-rate payroll tax.

One owner, insisting upon anonymity, insists the plan is under way.

“If that happens,” agent Tom Reich says, “you might as well start writing a eulogy for the game. Other sports have left baseball in the dust. Without an agreement, the next sport to pass it will be ice skating.”

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Since the inception of realignment, the four A.L. West teams have yet to win on the same day. Really.

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There are only two people who really know what happened that evening in the Cox household, but no matter how much Bobby and Pamela feel they’ve been unfairly scrutinized, the O.J. Simpson case forever has changed the way we cover domestic violence.

In days past, the police probably would have told Bobby and Pam Cox to settle their differences and then spent the next 30 minutes asking Bobby about the Braves’ chances this year. Today, Cox’s arrest is front-page news. Maybe Cox, one of the game’s finest gentlemen, is paying for Simpson’s sins. Then again, maybe he’s paying for his own.

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The Houston Astros say they’ll trade John Hudek only if the Cleveland Indians are willing to take starter Greg Swindell, who still has $8.4 million remaining in the final two years of his contract. ... Although the Baltimore Orioles won their arbitration case with third baseman Leo Gomez ($925,000), they still want him out and are talking with the Texas Rangers about a deal that would send outfielders Damon Buford and Alex Ochoa to Texas for third baseman Dean Palmer.

The New York Yankees privately are worried about the durability of starter Jimmy Key, and Owner George Steinbrenner continues to ridicule starter Sterling Hitchcock behind closed doors. The Yankees want to acquire another starter, and quickly. ... All you need to know about the Minnesota Twins’ woes is that last week they pinch-hit for their cleanup hitter. If that wasn’t bad enough, Alex Cole was the pinch-hitter.

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Giants General Manager Bob Quinn was ridiculed in the Bay area for allowing starters Bill Swift and John Burkett to get away. Well, it would have cost about $3.5 million to sign either Swift or Burkett for 1995. For $3.385 million, Quinn signed Terry Mulholland, Mark Leiter, Glenallen Hill, Trevor Wilson, Jose Bautista and Mark Dewey. “We had to be fiscally responsible,” Quinn says, “and so far things are working out.”

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Boston Red Sox shortstop John Valentin may be the most underrated player in the game. He has a .491 slugging percentage the past three seasons, compared with Reds shortstop Barry Larkin’s .440 slugging percentage. ... It can’t get much worse for Josh Booty, the Florida Marlins’ No. 1 pick last season. First he opened the year batting .093 with 38 strikeouts. Then he was suspended for three games last week for using a grooved bat in a Class-A Midwest League game.

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Dodgers reliever Rob Murphy celebrated the fact that a team he played for finally was able to win a game May 10 in San Diego, ending a 20-game losing streak while playing for the Astros and Cardinals. Murphy was released the next day. ... In a Giants-Padres game last week, Giants catcher Jeff Reed and Padres second baseman Jody Reed each went 4 for 4. The two were on base 11 times without making a single out. “It must have been a holiday for guys named Reed,” Jeff Reed says.

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Yes, that was Carlos Perez who not only won his major league debut last week against the Phillies, but also hit a mammoth homer in the game. “We were thinking about sending him to New York by cab,” Montreal Expos Manager Felipe Alou was saying, “because we didn’t want to listen to him talk all the way back on the bus.” Carlos, by the way, is much more like Pasqual than Melido. ... Dodgers reliever Todd Worrell has as good an explanation as anyone for the rash of runs being scored at Coors Field: “It’s the influence of the Broncos,” he says. “That’s why you need two touchdowns and a field goal to win.” Says Rockies Manager Don Baylor: “Anyone turning their back to buy a hot dog in the left-field bleachers should be told to beware.”

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Didn’t you used to be Marvin Freeman? The Rockies ace who signed a two-year, $4.4-million contract in December is winless in his first three starts with a repulsive 16.20 ERA. ... Kevin Mitchell, playing for the Fukuoka Daiei Hawks, may be getting close to $3.9 million, but he’ll be spending nearly all that in phone bills. The guy keeps calling all of his pals, saying how much he misses them, and wonders if it’s really necessary for his team to undergo an hour’s worth of stretching each day.