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Belle Tolls a Total Breakdown of Meter

I’m so sick of Albert Belle.

He can go straight to, well . . .

Straight to Baltimore, perhaps,

Where he can have another lapse

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Of taste and style and couth

And threaten yet another youth

And prove he totally lacks class.

Albert Belle can kiss my foot.

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ALLEN E. KAHN

Playa del Rey

*

Major league baseball can be improved if it:

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1--Makes pulled groin muscles illegal.

2--Force-feeds Tom Lasorda Ultra Slim Fast.

3--Compels Albert Belle to play for Marge Schott.

STAN KAPLAN

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Garden Grove


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