Americans Just Don’t Get a Kick Out of It
Bernie Lincicome of the Rocky Mountain News, commenting on America’s lack of passion for soccer:
“It isn’t as if we haven’t given soccer a chance. We’ve had leagues forever, amateur, pro, outdoors, indoors. We even put them on television. Pele came by. We liked him OK.
“Kids play soccer. Dads coach it. Mothers watch their own child and take pictures. The boom is any day now.”
More Lincicome: “Here’s an item from Antonio Matarrese, president of the Italian Soccer League, who expressed astonishment at how we treat soccer like a picnic. ‘The American public looks at a game as a day out to eat popcorn and hot dogs. In Europe, the fans can’t eat because their stomachs are closed up by tension.’
“Now, I ask you, who is the healthiest?”
Enough already: And this from Mike Lupica of the New York Daily News: “If there was going to be a soccer explosion in this country, believe me, it would have happened already.
“And I’m tired of being lectured by soccer heads that this is somehow a failure of American sophistication, or soul, or even the media.”
Trivia time: Who holds the major league record for grand slams?
Selfish guys: Tom Bunevich, who for 14 years ran autograph shows in the Tampa area, has written a paperback, “Sign This.”
The most striking is the chapter in which he lists and details “My Top Ten Jerks.” Heading the list is Willie Mays. His synopsis:
“Doesn’t bother to make eye contact or even brief conversation with customers. Only there for the dough and he doesn’t care who knows it--even if he leaves lifelong worshippers ex-worshippers.”
Of Ricky Henderson, No. 2 on the list, he writes: “Slows his signing pace so he can be paid OT for those still in line.
“Doesn’t meet the terms of his engagement.”
So what? Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel writes that former Nebraska football coach Tom Osbone, who serves in the U.S House of Representatives, is trying to get a bill passed that would prosecute unscrupulous sports agents.
“And, pray tell, what’s next on your congressional calendar, Rep. Osborne? Trying to get the zone blitz outlawed?
“Sponsoring the Federal Chop Block Protection Act? Giving the FBI a break from this terrorism stuff so they can start investigating the tuck rule?”
Talking a good game: Charles Oakley is the leading vote-getter for the NBA’s all-interview team, according to the league.
Oakley is joined on the first team by Milwaukee’s Ray Allen, Minnesota’s Kevin Garnett, the Lakers’ Shaquille O’Neal and Seattle’s Brent Barry.
Orlando’s Doc Rivers led the coaching category.
Trivia answer: Lou Gehrig of the New York Yankees, 23.
And finally: Scott Ostler in the San Francisco Chronicle:
“These NBA pre-draft visits and workouts have become a separate silly season.
“The Warriors like to have their decision-makers take the potential draftee to dinner (‘Mike Dunleavy showed good use of salad fork, but was slow on transition from main course to dessert’) and bring him in for a workout.
“It’s the NBA dine and dance.”
