This hot dog idea is all soggy

The rest of America might be shocked to learn this, but here in L.A. we eat our ballpark hot dogs the same way everyone else does.

We use relish. We sprinkle on some chopped onions. Here, the mustard hasn’t come off the hot dog since Chick Hearn passed away.

It might be time to start spreading the news, because self-described “Hot Dog King” Louie DiRaimondo has announced the creation of nine designer dogs for “the cities with the most extreme baseball fans.” And what has King Louie decided to place on top of L.A.’s dog?

Bean sprouts, slices of avocado and hummus.

Would any Dodgers fan eat a dog like that?

Believe it or not, America, out here beans sprout from our messy drive-thru burritos, avocado slices are for guacamole and Hummers are to be driven to buy our burritos and avocados.

Yes, we eat our hot dogs the way the rest of the country does, with maybe one exception.

We usually eat ours one at a time.

That would be the Jumbo Dog

It could be worse, L.A. fans. Consider the condiments King Louie has chosen for dogs in other big league cities:

* Chowder filled with clams, potato chunks, celery and onions for the Boston dog.

* Sweet peach marmalade for the Atlanta dog.

* Pizza tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese and mushrooms for the Chicago dog.

* Chocolate sauce for San Francisco dogs because, according to the news release, Giants fans “are world famous for their love of chocolate.”

Maybe so. But the Giants have a certain left fielder world famous for other reasons, and we notice King Louie hasn’t doctored that dog with “the cream” and “the clear.”

Trivia time

Florida will appear in consecutive NCAA tournament title games if it defeats UCLA on Saturday. Which is the last NCAA champion to return to the title game the following season?

Lettuce came with pictures of dead presidents

So what did LeBron James and his new friend, multibillionaire Warren Buffett, order when they first met for lunch a few months ago?

Cheeseburgers. In one of Buffett’s favorite restaurants in his hometown of Omaha.

“He wanted a few tips on basketball and I wanted a little advice on money,” Buffett quipped during an interview with the Akron Beacon Journal.

“No, we switch. He tells me what socks to buy and I tell him what stocks to buy.”

Buffett, estimated by Forbes magazine to be worth $52 billion, was James’ guest at Sunday’s Cleveland Cavaliers home game against the Denver Nuggets. Wearing a black T-shirt with a glittering “Witness” decorating the front, Buffett, 76, said it was his first NBA game in 60 years.

“I like basketball. I used to play when I was young -- not very well,” Buffett said. “Of course in Nebraska, they tend to identify with football.”

And in the NBA, some players tend to get nervous at the sight of old guys wearing T-shirts that say, “Witness.”

Trivia answer

Kentucky won the title in 1996 and lost to Arizona in the 1997 title game. Duke is the last team to have won consecutive title games (1991 and 1992).

And finally

From David Letterman: “You know what happened yesterday? Elton John [turned] 60 years old. He celebrated by having his 60th concert at Madison Square Garden. And then he beat the Knicks, 102-94.”

mike.penner@latimes.com