From Brad Pitt to Renée Zellweger, these were the best quotes from the 2020 Oscars

James Corden and Rebel Wilson
Oscars presenters James Corden, left, and Rebel Wilson got to crack a joke at the expense of “Cats.”
(Chris Pizzello / Associated Press )

With the Oscars audience expected to hit the tens of millions, the show was an irresistible opportunity for Hollywood stars to share their thoughts.

Some managed to express those thoughts better than others, however. Here are some of the more memorable lines from Sunday’s ceremony at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles.

Brad Pitt, accepting the Oscar for supporting actor:
“They told me I only have 45 seconds up here, which is 45 seconds more than the Senate gave John Bolton this week.”

Laura Dern, supporting actress winner and daughter of actors Diane Ladd and Bruce Dern:
“Some say never meet your heroes, but I say, if you’re really blessed, you get them as your parents.”


Taika Waititi, adapted screenplay winner:
“I want to dedicate this to all the indigenous kids in the world who want to do art and dance and write stories. We are the original storytellers, and we make it here as well.”

Miky Lee, executive producer, after “Parasite” won best picture:
“I really like to thank director Bong. Thank you. Thank you for being you. And I like everything about him. His smile. His crazy hair. The way he talks. The way he walks, and especially the way he directs.”

Bernie Taupin after winning for original song along with Elton John:
“Wow, this doesn’t suck.”

Elton John after winning for original song:
“Thank you to Bernie [Taupin], who has been the constant thing in my life, when I was screwed up, when I was normal, he was always there for me.”

Chris Rock introducing members in the audience:
“Mahershala Ali is here tonight. Mahershala has two Oscars. You know what that means when the cops pull him over? Nothing.”

Steve Martin explaining why he didn’t want to crack a joke about Amazon executive Jeff Bezos:
“I like getting my packages on time.”

Julia Louis-Dreyfus presenting the cinematography award:
“Not only does the cinematographer prepare the meals for the crew and cast, it is also the cinematographer who knocks on your trailer door to let you know that it is time to get to the set to create magic.”

Will Ferrell introducing the nominees for film editing:
“Oh, do we know all about film editors. They’re the ones that like to cut out a lot of my lines.”


Tom Hanks in a special announcement:
“It is a pleasure to announce that the Academy Museum of Motion Pictures will open its doors on Dec. 14th of 2020. It’s going to be a very big deal.”

James Corden and Rebel Wilson, presenting the visual effects Oscar while dressed as felines:
“As cast members of the motion picture ‘Cats,’ nobody more than us understands the importance of good visual effects.”

Bong Joon Ho after “Parasite” won the trophy for international feature:
“I’m ready to drink tonight, until next morning.”

Sigourney Weaver before introducing the first female conductor in Oscars history:
“Kidding aside, we also want to stand here together and say that all women are superheroes”

Joaquin Phoenix after winning for lead actor:
“We feel entitled to artificially inseminate a cow and when she gives birth we steal her baby even though her cries of anguish are unmistakable.”

Renée Zellweger after winning for lead actress:
“This past year of conversations celebrating Judy Garland across generations and across cultures has been a really cool reminder that our heroes unite us.”