Jewel, husband Ty Murray divorcing; explain ‘tender undoing’
Jewel and her husband Ty Murray weren’t meant for each other after all -- they’re divorcing after six years of marriage and 16 years together.
The Grammy-nominated folk singer made the announcement on her blog Wednesday, giving a detailed explanation of their union’s “thoughtful and tender undoing” in a post titled “Dear World.”
“My husband, friend and partner of 16 years and I have decided to get a divorce,” wrote the 40-year-old “You Were Meant For Me” singer, whose full name is Jewel Kilcher.
The singer wed the professional bull rider, 44, in the Bahamas in 2008 after dating for 10 years.
Jewel said that she made the announcement on her blog because she wanted fans to hear it directly from herself and Murray rather than “the tabloids.” And, as if taking a page out of Gwyneth Paltrow’s “conscious uncoupling” playbook, the singer completely re-branded the breakup.
“Ty and I have always tried to live the most authentic life possible, and we wanted our separation as husband and wife to be nothing less loving than the way we came together,” she explained. “For some time we have been engaged in a private and difficult, but thoughtful and tender undoing of ourselves. Allowing ourselves the time and space to redefine what we are to each other with love rather than malice.”
The lengthy blog post -- full of Jewel-like tropes -- continued to explain why the singer likes to live her public life with authenticity and said that she didn’t want “anger to burn the ties that bound” them.
“Instead we have chosen the much more difficult task of undoing ourselves stich by stich [sic], and releasing each other with love so that we may take on our new form: dear friends and devoted co-parents of our beloved son Kase,” whom they welcomed in July 2011.
“We have no desire to damage ourselves and each other in the process. Who better than each other to bear witness to the heart ache of redefining our family? And who better as ally, while we learn to redraw ourselves in whatever new shape we find as separate people who are still striving to be the best versions of ourselves- as humans and as parents.”
As for the reason for their split? Not the rote “irreconcilable differences,” though that shouldn’t be totally cast aside just yet since it’s a legal answer. It was growth.
“Oddly the very thing that Ty and I sought in coming together is the very thing we seek in separating. We both value growth. And growth became tragically and undeniably stifled as a couple, and we believe we can find it again in setting each other free,” Jewel wrote. “We truly believe we can find greater happiness apart than together, and this is why we are taking the enormous and heartbreaking step of divorce.”
She finished off the post with a note of solidarity with others going through similar troubles in their marriage and added a boilerplate joint statement from herself and Murray.
“Our dedication to our son is unwavering and we are both committed to being the best partners in raising our son. Due to the spirit in which we have gone about this separation, we trust we can remain dear friends who hold each other in high esteem, which is so important to us as parents- as we wish only what is best for our son,” they said, signing off that portion with “Ty and Jewel.”
There’s a thoughtful and tender undoing going on here too. Follow me @NardineSaad.