For those people not watching “The Bachelorette” Monday night, the unidentified clunking sound was Jordan Rodgers throwing his brother, Green Bay Packers quarterback and Super Bowl MVP Aaron, directly under the bus.
After the customary “recapping of the date we just experienced” segment of the one-on-one date that Jordan and bachelorette JoJo Fletcher had just experienced, he opened up to her about who in his family she would meet, were she to choose him for one of the hometown dates next week.
His parents. His brother Luke. His brother Luke’s dog, Carl Weathers.
He faltered before continuing.
“My middle brother won’t be there,” he said.
“And that’s … Aaron?” she responded, as though the show hadn’t built an entire season around the fact that Rodgers had a famous brother.
Jordan went on to explain that though he has a great relationship with his older brother Luke, his relationship with Aaron is lacking.
“It’s just the way he’s chosen to do life,” he said. “I chose to stay close with my family and my parents and my brother.”
Dang, son. That’s cold.
As unbelievable as it may seem that a world-class athlete wouldn’t want to drop everything and appear on a network reality dating show on which his younger brother was in a serious relationship with a woman also in a serious relationship with three other men, it seems to be the case when it comes to Aaron Rodgers.
In fact, Jordan said he wasn’t even sure that Aaron was aware he was going on “The Bachelorette,” though one has to imagine by now he’s pieced it together.
The younger Rodgers does attempt to throw his brother a bone, saying that he can’t imagine the kind of pressure Aaron must be under, and the demands he must face from people -- likely because the rigors of one year on the Tampa Bay Buccaneers practice squad can’t really compare to a career spent as one of the elite QBs of all time.
“So, you don’t talk at all?” Fletcher asked, her eyes dimming, her box seats at picturesque Lambeau Field disappearing before her very eyes.
“No, not really,” he said, before launching into a long spiel about a lifetime spent in his brother’s shadow and the harrowing ordeal that is not being good enough to play professional football, a challenge that millions of other Americans struggle with every day.
As though trying to strengthen her reserve, Fletcher took a long, fortifying sip of her mixed drink before launching into another bout of active listening, punctuated by occasional E! red-carpet-style conversation.
Then, after admitting that he was merely the Post Toasties to Aaron’s Corn Flakes, Jordan declared his undying love for JoJo, immediately reinvigorating her interest and temporarily distracting her from the fact that she would never become best friends with Olivia Munn at this rate.
Aaron Rodgers has yet to comment as to the validity of his brother’s claims, most likely because he doesn’t really care about what happens on “The Bachelorette.”