L.A. Affairs: I’m over coronavirus — I want my love life back

Illustration of a phone that says: Tom. 26. Goals: To go outside again someday.
The year is 2020. The time is quarantine o'clock. I am couch chillin' minding my own damn business. Thinking of my crush who just moved back to Oakland from L.A.

Who knows when I'll be able to see his fine self again?

We barely started talking. a few weeks into the shutdown. With so much uncertainty about the future, who knows if the crush will develop into anything else since we can't make plans to see each other.

At any rate, it's probably best to keep my options open and just try to enjoy the apocalypse while it's happening. Boxed sangria from Trader Joe's has helped in the entertainment arena.



Tinder has also been a spectacle during all this. Phone with text that says: Tom. 26. Goals: To go outside again someday.

The most amusing has been all my exes emerging from obscurity. Ex #1: Hey. Long time no talk. Ex #2: Hola! Crazy times huh? Ex #3: Miss u girl.

Overall, times are looking grim right now for single peeps trying to date. Guess I'll go bake banana bread... the closest thing to a "hot" date I'm getting in 2020.

The author is a Los Angeles-based illustrator.

Straight, gay, bisexual, transgender or nonbinary: L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for love in and around Los Angeles — and we want to hear your story. You must allow your name to be published, and the story you tell has to be true. We pay $300 for each essay we publish. Email us at You can find submission guidelines here.


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