Judge not Lindsay Lohan, lest you be judged too!

Remember the movie “Desperately Seeking Susan,” in which a young woman (played by Madonna, in what some thought wasn’t much of a stretch) wreaks havoc on the lives of most of the folks she comes in contact with?

I always thought Susan was fictional. But it turns out she has a real-life counterpart: Lindsay Lohan.

Lohan’s troubles have been well documented. What’s new is the collateral damage on the legal system. Two judges have been disciplined by California’s Commission on Judicial Performance for their handling of Lohan’s DUI case.

PHOTOS: The trials and tribulations of Lindsay Lohan

Yep, finally, someone got tough in this case -- on the judges!

L.A. County Superior Court judges Marsha Revel and Elden Fox at the Beverly Hills courthouse got their wrists slapped, legally speaking:

“The commission acted on accusations that Revel improperly met alone with an attorney who wanted to take over Lohan’s defense, and that Fox erred in denying the actress bail on a relatively minor charge and refusing to hear her attorney’s arguments. Both incidents occurred during a period of intense media attention in 2010 culminating in the star’s two-week term behind bars.”

Revel got a two-fer of celebrity injustice. She not only got mixed up with Lohan; her offense was meeting privately with lawyer Robert Shapiro (of O.J. Simpson trial fame). He -- surprise -- wanted to be Lohan’s lawyer. And -- double surprise -- that didn’t happen.

But the whole mess landed the judge in hot water. Which gives new meaning to the term “double jeopardy.” Somewhere, Lance Ito is mumbling, “I told you so.”

Fox’s misdeed, though, was the most shocking.

“In September, Lohan appeared before Fox on suspicion of violating her probation after failing a drug test.

In a move that surprised legal experts at the time, Fox denied the actress bail and ordered her jailed until the next court hearing -- highly unusual for a misdemeanor probation violation.”

That’s right: Fox got fed up with a defendant who had repeatedly failed to show up in court, who had violated parole, etc. etc., and so he did something every parent has done and shouted, “Enough! Go to you room!” And what does he get as thanks? A judicial scolding.

Now, I’m no lawyer; I’m no judge. There are undoubtedly legal protocols involved here, and I don’t mean to second-guess the decisions against the judges.

But let’s just say that if/when Lohan comes to court again, as a judge, the first legal word that would come to my mind is “recusal.”

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