THE HUMANITY OF NERDS : Overwhelmed With ‘Layers’ in a Teen Gross-Out Movie

I managed to avoid “Revenge of the Nerds” for nearly a year. I felt I had done my part by seeing the monumental “Porky’s” and the colossal “Police Academy” (the adjectives apply to box-office grosses, not their artistic achievements), the two biggies of the post-”Animal House” period.

But then, the other day, Time magazine got around to writing something on the teen gross-out genre, and Jeff Kanew, director of “Revenge of the Nerds,” was quoted as saying, “The studio’s instruction to me was, ‘Give us “Animal House.” ’ I gave it to them but tried to layer it with some humanity and real characters.”

I was overcome with misgivings. I like movies that have layers of humanity. Generally, the more layers, the better. And to layer a teen gross-out movie with humanity seemed a notable accomplishment. If we can layer teen movies with humanity then perhaps we can layer billions of teen-agers with humanity and save the human race.

I rented a “Revenge” videocassette and undertook to look for layers of humanity. Boom , an unmistakable layer hit me: Robert Carradine, playing a principal nerd, was his buddy’s father figure. And that obnoxious horse laugh came from his father--connoting paternal influence, lineage, motivation, some serious layers.

But analyzing layers of humanity can be tough: One man’s layer might not be another’s. Was the mincing black dancer (played by Larry B. Scott) layered, since he was proudly gay--or a limp-wristed laugh-getter? Was the Japanese student (Brian Tochi) layered, since he was smart--or pathetically horny, slavering over bare breasts and genitalia? Was the bespectacled girlfriend (Michelle Meyrink) a caricatured, four-eyed nerdette--or was she layered, since she surprised us by becoming sexually aggressive?

Layering characters with humanity was a lot more complicated than I had imagined.

And how was I supposed to know which were Kanew’s layers, and which were the contributions of others? Maybe executive producer David Obst had added a couple of layers, or some humanistic honcho at 20th Century Fox. Steve Zacharias and Jeff Buhai had the chance to stick in a few layers--they wrote the screenplay. And what about Tim Metcalfe and Miguel Tejada-Flores, who helped create the story? Did any of their layers survive revisions? Was it possible that Kanew, in his interview, was hogging all the credit?

Then the plot threw me for a loop. Just when I was getting behind the sympathetic nerds, they staged a “panty raid” on the local snob sorority to get even with the mean jocks. But the nerds wanted more than lingerie: They mauled women, invaded their showers while they were naked, secretly videotaped them as they undressed, ogling the best shots over beer. One likable nerd ripped the clothes off a young woman and chased her down a hallway until she was saved by the overweight housemother. (I don’t think she was layered.)

The nerds had turned violent, criminal, viciously misogynist--the sorority girls had acted snobbish, the film makers seemed to be saying, so didn’t they deserve a little mauling and humiliation? Then it struck me that Kanew and company had something much deeper in mind--probing the nerds’ psychological duality, their “dark side.” More layering!

After that, I started seeing layers right and left. The sorority queen (Julie Montgomery), whose naked picture was put on pie plates by the nerds and sold at the college carnival (what a bunch of crazy, layered guys!), went from ice princess to sexual tigress to nerd sympathizer. Anthony Edwards from gutless twerp to militant leader. Carradine from dork to stud to spokesman for the rights of the downtrodden. In the final bonfire scene, the layers of humanity were so thick (even the jocks were limpid-eyed) you could hardly tell who was who anymore!

I realized that was just the point: We’re all nerds, one way or another. All different, yet all the same. All a bit ineffectual and insecure in some way. All deserving of compassion, understanding, love.

Except, of course, fat housemothers, humiliated women and oversexed Japanese. You can’t be expected to layer everybody with humanity.

Not when you have a chance to make layers and layers of money.