What’s Left? Ballet, Jousting : A No-Football Survival Guide

So here it is: a big, empty Sunday staring you in the face.

Just as fans were warming up to a season of Rams and Raiders, a players’ strike has left fans out in the cold. The truly desperate, of course, can watch last year’s Super Bowl, but there will be no live pro football on the field--or the tube--this weekend.

Clearly, it’s time for a plan of action, time to embark on a search for life beyond the easy chair and the cold six-pack. Here are some ideas for surviving an autumnal Sunday without football:

Remember when football teams were sending their players to ballet lessons to improve their agility? Well, Sunday presents an opportunity to get a taste of the real thing--and trade a trip to the bar for a trip to the barre--as the Joffrey Ballet closes its engagement at the Orange County Performing Arts Center with a performance of “La Fille mal Gardee” at 2 p.m.

“I personally feel that dance--and especially the Joffrey Ballet--is one of the most athletic disciplines of the performing arts,” said Ria Carlson, a public relations associate for the Center. “You’ll be able to see the same type of jumps, the same type of holdings, the same type of rolling you’d see at a football game--only with a little more finesse.” And, yes, tickets are still available.

Carlson said she’s a football fan herself, “although I must admit I’m not nearly as enthusiastic as my husband and his friends.”

On Sunday, Carlson has to work. Her husband, Jim Gerdts, won’t be idle, however: “He’s coming to the ballet,” she said. “He’s going to get his (football) fix on Saturday with the college games.”

For those who like their action more rough-and-tumble, the Shanghai-based Incredible Acrobats of China troupe will perform at Fullerton’s Plummer Auditorium at 2:30 p.m. Sure, it’s still not football, but let’s see Eric Dickerson and six of his teammates balance themselves on a stack of chairs.

Football fans who don’t want to give up contact and competition can find them in Buena Park at the Medieval Times Dinner Tournament, where armored knights joust on horseback while fans scream lustily, eat with their hands and down pints of ale. Sunday seatings are at 1, 4:45 and 7:30 p.m.

“Our knights train probably as hard as football players, basketball players or anyone else,” said Jan Hill of Medieval Times’ marketing department. “In fact, one of our knights was Athlete of the Week on Channel 13 about two months ago.”

For diners at Medieval Times, Hill said, the thrill of watching knights joust is the same as watching a football game.

“Oh, yes,” she said, “because you’re sitting in a big arena and you have banners and you root because it’s competition. So people could cheer here instead of at a football field. . . . No hot dogs, though.”

On the more genteel--but no less competitive--end of the sports spectrum, some of the top players in women’s tennis (including U.S. Open champ Martina Navratilova) are scheduled to compete in the Audi Challenge Tournament at Rancho San Clemente Tennis and Fitness Club. Sunday is the final day of the four-day tournament. Matches start at noon.

“It is fabulous. It is more exciting than football. I’m serious,” said Joleen Lipka, the club’s controller. “I came to my first match Thursday night, and the excitement here is really unbelievable. The women that are playing down here are phenomenal. I mean, between the concentration and the excitement just watching them--they’re such great athletes.”

There are also some events for the musically inclined. Those who remember the days before sports strikes may also remember Donovan, the Scottish folkie who scored some hits in the ‘60s (“Sunshine Superman” and “Mellow Yellow,” to name two). He’ll be making a stop at the Coach House in San Juan Capistrano; show time is 8 p.m. At Irvine Meadows Amphitheatre, a reconstituted Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Rossington Band will perform, also at 8.

Bluegrass and country musicians, along with folk dancers, magicians and storytellers, will provide the entertainment at the Harvest Festival and Christmas Crafts Festival from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. at the Anaheim Convention Center. Also on the festival front: the Hillcrest Lively Arts Festival at Hillcrest Park in Fullerton from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.

There also are opportunities to combine a couple of relatively mundane activities--getting a haircut or taking a walk--with helping local charities.

An eight-kilometer walk-a-thon starts at Western Medical Center in Santa Ana at 9 a.m. The event will raise funds for the hospital’s diabetes treatment center and for the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation.

And Fragments, a Corona del Mar salon, will offer discount haircuts from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. and will donate the proceeds to the Huntington Beach Community Clinic.

“My feelings are as much as I’m into football, I was willing to give up the day to do cutting,” said the owner, Pinky (“That’s all I’m known by for 48 years”).

Pinky thinks watching 30 hairdressers work will be just as exciting as watching football: “We cut hair by the yard.”