QUICK KICKS

* DON’T SCHEDULE THAT FAMILY PORTRAIT JUST YET: Now that the Houston Oilers have won three consecutive games and appear headed back toward the playoffs, all the controversy there has ended, right?

No so fast, said defensive end Ray Childress.

“It’s been kind of quiet here for two weeks. . . . We’re waiting for a bomb to go off,” Childress said this week.

And of the bad feelings between players and some coaches, he said: “They haven’t gone away. They have just cooled down. There is still plenty of disappointment here, still plenty of questions.”

But what about those three victories?

“Hey, so we beat New England, Cincinnati and Seattle,” he said, needing to say no more. “Let’s just see what happens from here.”

* WE SAW THIS COMING: After the New York Jets beat the Miami Dolphins last Sunday, Boomer Esiason fired the first shots at Dolphin replacement quarterback Scott Mitchell, who previously received only praise.

“The first thing that happened to us today was that Dan Marino was not playing,” said the Jet quarterback. “Let’s get that straight. This is not the same team without Dan Marino.”

Esiason then ripped Mitchell’s only touchdown pass, a 65-yard wobbler to Irving Fryar, who was left wide open when the Jets’ secondary was fooled by a play fake.

“When he threw that up, I heard all the hunters in the stadium yell, ‘Pull,’ ” Esiason said. “I almost ran out and caught it myself.”

* ONE AND THE SAME: If you are wondering why staid NFL owners are not going to award a Baltimore franchise to prospective owner Leonard (Boogie) Weinglass, rent the 1982 movie, “Diner.”

The lovable gambler played by Mickey Rourke? That’s Boogie, who was immortalized by high school buddy and filmmaker Barry Levinson.

Although Boogie reportedly said that he would cut off his gray pony tail if the NFL would award him a franchise, don’t count on it. The charming millionaire keeps it as his one link to his streetwise past.

* IS THERE ANYBODY IN THIS LEAGUE WHO DOESN’T RIP HIS FORMER BOSS? Gary Zimmerman, tackle for the Denver Broncos, has announced he would fight Minnesota Viking President Roger Headrick on the streets of Denver before Sunday’s game.

Zimmerman, a former Viking, said Headrick ruined the organization when he was hired in January of 1991 from the Pillsbury Co.

“When Roger came in, I thought everything was focused around the dollar,” Zimmerman said. “They took away the coaches’ cars. They took all the perks from the coaches. They told the groundskeeper he was paid 80% more than he’s worth. They treated their office people bad. They just treated people like dogs.”

* WHAT’S WRONG COACH, DON’T YOU EVER LOOK AT THAT MAGNET ON YOUR REFRIGERATOR? You know the Chargers are winning again because Coach Bobby Ross is forgetting things again. After watching his team get burned on kickoff returns by Rocket Ismail and brother Qadry on consecutive weeks, Ross said: “I’m glad we don’t have to face an Ismail any more this year.”

Wrong again, Boss. On Nov. 21, the Raiders and Rocket visit San Diego.

* THEY MADE A TRADE FOR A COUPLE OF STRETCHERS TO BE NAMED: The Seattle Seahawks have suffered so many injuries (nine defensive players have gone down in the last five games) that after last week’s game at Houston, they ran out of crutches and had to borrow a pair from the Oilers.