‘Sinkies’ Shed Guilt, Decide to Chow Down Openly

For years they did it on the sly and felt guilty. Relatives were ashamed, neighbors ridiculed them, friends called them names.

Then Norm Hankoff decided to do something to remove the cloud hanging over the table-impaired, those who scarf down meals over the kitchen sink.

Hankoff formed the International Assn. of People Who Dine Over the Kitchen Sink. He also wrote “The Official Sinkies Don’t Cook Book”--a book about eating, not cooking. And he established the day after Thanksgiving as Sinkie Day.

“Our slogan is, ‘Get in touch with your inner Sinkie,’ ” said Hankoff, of Santa Rosa, Calif. “And that made them feel good. They can certainly feel no shame now.”

Hankoff came up with the idea in 1991, while wolfing down some tuna salad over his sink, using extra-strength potato chips as utensils.

So enthusiastic was Hankoff that he even tried enticing the first family to join. In March 1994, when Hillary Rodham Clinton was looking for an American chef, Hankoff sent a letter suggesting the Clintons “embark upon an alternative style of dining.” He enclosed his book.

In return, Hankoff got a letter from the White House, thanking him for “your kind words and your thoughtful gift.”

Those who joined were rewarded with a certificate of membership featuring the association’s insignia--a large double sink--and the Sinkie motto:

“Everybody does it. Sinkies proudly admit it.”

Some even suggested making Finland’s capital, Helsinki, the association’s headquarters--a suggestion Hankoff dismissed as the world’s worst pun.

“It’s a hoot,” said Bill McGuire, 52, a corporate branding manager at Business Week in Chicago, who has been a serious Sinkie since age 8.

“It’s a way of life,” he said of his dining habit. “I can’t remember sitting down by myself and luxuriating over the meal.”

Typically, Sinkies are busy, involved, always-on-the-go people who occasionally save precious minutes by eating over the sink.

They use their fingers to eat such Sinkie delicacies as meat loaf, cakeless frosting and cream cheese--a convenience that eliminates the need for washing utensils, wiping off the counters or sweeping the floor.

Couples who want some ambience as they cocoon over the sink can turn on the tap for a romantic dinner with a view of the water.

Because wasting time is anathema to Sinkies, the day after Thanksgiving was the most obvious choice as the day to celebrate Sinkiekind: There are plenty of leftovers, and people are rushing off to do Christmas shopping.

On that day, the association announces its annual list of prominent Suspected Closet Sinkies. Last year’s list included House Speaker Newt Gingrich (R-Ga.), Judith Martin (Miss Manners), singer Dionne Warwick and Martha Stewart.

More than a thousand people have joined.

Michelle Ewald of Fairview, Okla., surprised her father on Father’s Day with a membership.

“We were surprised when we found that this practice was so widespread,” said Ewald, a non-Sinkie. “We had kept it quiet, thinking we were the only family that has a Sinkie.”

She admitted that her father has tried, subtly, to convert the rest of the family.

“He might be standing at the sink with something and say, ‘Try some of this,’ ” she said. “He’d hand it to you right there at the sink, without a dish or anything, so you’re compelled into joining in the Sinkie behavior.”