CHRIS DIFESNE’S TOP 25

1. Florida State (11-0) Seminole players hold contest to predict margin of victory in Sugar Bowl.

2. Virginia Tech (11-0) Swept up by Hokie fever, Rankman was told to rest and drink plenty of fluids.

3. Nebraska (10-1) Cornhuskers wouldn’t be in BCS mess had they bounced a lucky TD off some guy’s foot against Texas.

4. Tennessee (9-2) Fiesta Bowl sponsors plan to dye tortilla chips orange for Volunteers’ return visit.

5. Florida (9-2) Spurrier to implement sportswriter rotation for SEC title game.

6. Alabama (9-2) DuBose borrows BCS computer to calculate odds of beating Spurrier twice in same season.

7. Wisconsin (9-2) To save wear, local Pop Warner champions will simulate Stanford defense in Rose Bowl practice.

8. Michigan State (9-2) Saban’s last memo to self: Get haircut, pay light bill, cancel tryout for Regis’ show.

9. Michigan (9-2) School offers to help Michigan State relocate to North Dakota.

10. Marshall (11-0) Players disappointed to learn Motor City Bowl gift this year is a fan belt.

11. Kansas State (10-1) In wake of latest BCS snub, Snyder names Rodney Dangerfield honorary captain.

12. Minnesota (8-3) Jesse “the Sun Bowl” Ventura elected to throw out first body slam against Oregon.

13. Southern Mississippi (8-3) Looks forward to pregame cultural exchange with Colorado State at Liberty Bowl.

14. Mississippi State (9-2) Last-second win left egg on Mississippi’s face.

15. Penn State (9-3) Rankman.com has learned Paterno will receive 50% senior discount for Alamo tour.

16. Texas A&M; (8-3) Aggies now set for Alamo showdown against Penn State.

17. Texas (9-3) Simms facing A&M; in first start was like facing Pedro Martinez in first at-bat.

18. Georgia (7-4) As punishment for blown call, SEC refs ordered to give Uga VI a sponge bath.

19. Georgia Tech (8-3) Win over Georgia biggest snafu in Atlanta since Olympics.

20. Stanford (8-3) Stanford band and Rose Bowl officials convene to go over the ground rules.

21. Purdue (7-4) School denies Georgia request to bring SEC officials’ crew for Outback Bowl.

22. Arkansas (7-4) Cotton Bowl thinks the Hogs are still in the Southwest Conference.

23. Miami (7-4) Makeup win over Temple on Saturday wins Hurricanes a ticket to the Gator Bowl.

24. Boston College (8-3) Insight.com bowl matchup vs. Colorado as exciting as watching chowder cool.

25. Utah (8-3) Yes, there still is a Las Vegas Bowl, and Utah is in it.