St. Louis Can’t Figure Out What’s Not to Love

Bernie Miklasz in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: “We are still waiting to see the fake flair in center field, with [Jim] Edmonds hamming it up to make routine catches look like something out of a Flying Wallendas act.

“We are still waiting to see evidence that Edmonds is to clubhouse chemistry what Yoko Ono was to the Beatles. Or that there’s a lever on his chest he flicks to put his game on cruise control.

“Instead, I see a guy who comes to the ballpark at the appointed time each day to mind his own business. He’s friendly to teammates, polite to visitors.

“And he’s batting .386 with six homers, 17 runs batted in, 17 walks and 18 runs scored [as of Friday].”

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Trivia time: What Laker playoff record is shared by Nick Van Exel and Robert Horry?

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Big bills: From The Gallery column in the San Diego Union-Tribune: “So you thought buying stock in Microsoft was a good move when the company went public? Consider Ralph Wilson’s $25,000 investment in 1959.

“That’s what he paid for the Buffalo Bills. The Bills are estimated to be worth more than $500 million.”

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We’ll survive: Bud Geracie in the San Jose Mercury News: “John Rocker isn’t talking to the media. Too bad he didn’t think of that earlier.”

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Schoolmaster: Gary Shelton in the St. Petersburg (Fla.) Times: “Look, I’ve never been an apologist for Bob Knight, and I think he deserves most of the criticism he’s getting. But, uh, Bobby, do you think you could talk to my kid about his economics grade?”

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More Shelton: “So much for doubting Al Davis’ genius. With Sebastian Janikowski, Davis wasn’t merely taking a kicker who could be deported. He was paving the way for the Raiders to move to Warsaw.”

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Cramped and spacious: Jon Heyman in Newsday: “Although they have won rave reviews for fan friendliness, Houston’s Enron Field and San Francisco’s Pacific Bell Park appear overly friendly toward hitters, and Detroit’s Comerica Park already seems way too chummy with pitchers.

“Tiger outfielder Bobby Higginson derisively dubbed Comerica Park ‘Comerica National Park’ because it’s large like Yellowstone or Yosemite.”

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Spoiled seniors: Ed Dougherty, on the controversy generated by the PGA of America’s decision to ban carts at the recent PGA Seniors Championship:

“Out here, guys bitch about everything. They even bitch about the ice cream.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1950, Charles Cooper, an All-American from Duquesne playing with the Harlem Globetrotters, was selected by the Boston Celtics in the NBA draft, becoming the first African American to be drafted.

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Trivia answer: Three-point field goals made in a game, seven.

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And finally: Nick Canepa in the San Diego Union-Tribune: “The NCAA just approved the addition of two more bowl games. One, believe it or not, will be the galleryfurniture.com Bowl in Houston, presumably to be played in somebody’s home.

“The other will be the Silicon Valley Classic in San Jose, to be played in Spartan Stadium, which is--how can I politely say this?--a dump.”