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Seeking Good Fortune in Del Mar Savings Plan

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Here at The Times we are allowed to sink 6% of our salary into a 401(k) plan with the company adding another 50 cents for every dollar we contribute, and after doing this now for about 10 or 12 years, the wife and I probably have enough money in our retirement fund to cover a good dinner at Denny’s--if given the senior discount.

That’s why I was here at Del Mar along with 37,284 fans Wednesday--making it the largest opening day crowd in the meet’s 63-year history--obviously everyone coming here in quest of the quick nest egg to make up for the bad gamble they’ve taken on the stock market.

Now I don’t recall a single moment in the last 10 to 12 years that I’ve been throwing away money in my 401(k) when I actually jumped to my feet in excitement, or proclaimed myself a winner. In fact I find it’s real hard to jump to my feet for any reason these days without taking a couple of Advil first.

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But at this place there is always that possibility I will feel young again.

One pick-six ticket paid $1,039,259.20 at Del Mar seven years ago, which would almost be enough money to keep the wife in shoes for another month or two.

Last year, a single pick-six ticket paid more than $110,000 on 10 occasions at Del Mar, and with Hollywood Park just completing its meet with a payoff of more than $900,000 for picking six consecutive winners, one good day like that and I find a dog to kick, and I could feel what it’s like to be Kevin Brown for a day.

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LIKE THE stock market, I know my limitations, so I chose to consult with the experts, meeting with Eddie Delahoussaye, Gary Stevens and the retired Chris McCarron in the Jockey’s Room at Del Mar to start fresh on my new retirement program: “Run You Pig, Run.”

“I’ve been getting killed in the stock market, too,” Delahoussaye cried, as if I could really care, but it did become obvious to me he has also been seeking alternative ways to set himself up for retirement.

“I heard this story where a lady bought $2,000 worth of Budweiser, saved the cans and then cashed them in for $72. That sounds like a good plan to me.”

Just what I wanted to hear from the jockey riding my selection in the second leg of the pick six on Wednesday.

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“OK, OK, I’ll give you some tips to win the pick six,” Delahoussaye said. “Bet on anyone wearing pink.”

You drink $2,000 worth of Budweiser, and of course you’re going to bet on the pink elephant to win.

“Give me the program,” Delahoussaye said as they loaded the horses into the gate on the TV in front of us for the start of the fourth race--the first leg in the pick six. “I’ll need my glasses, though, to read this.”

Tough to tell the pink horses from the pink elephants, of course, without glasses. But without his glasses, Delahoussaye still gave it a try, and pointed to the No. 7 horse in the program, saying it would win, and it did. Of course, without his glasses, he might have been trying to point at the No. 6 horse, but I wasn’t going to make fun of Mr. Magoo.

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EDDIE D, of course, is a Hall of Fame jockey, and considered the best in the business at coming from behind--I would imagine because without his glasses he gets lost a lot and then gets real excited when he finds his way home.

He has won 681 races at Del Mar the last 23 summers, and now sounds real committed to helping me. “You don’t have a chance of winning the pick six,” he said. “If I were you, I’d give me the money you would bet on the pick six, let me hold it, bury it in my back yard and dig it up for you when you’re ready to call it quits.”

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Delahoussaye then excused himself to ride Saphir Indien in the fifth, finishing last. It’s a shame he forget to take his glasses with him.

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McCARRON WAS much more supportive of my plan to invest 6% of my salary--as soon as I can convince The Times to also throw in 50 cents on every dollar I bet--to win the pick six, and enjoy retirement.

“If you bet the pick six 52 weeks a year, I think you’d win.” McCarron, the horse expert, told me this after losing $20 on Omega Code to win the third race.

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I put $32 down on the pick six, taking two horses in the fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh races, and one horse each in the eighth and ninth. And I almost hit the big one on the very first day of the meet.

I had the winner in the fourth and just missed on the next five races--and the pick six payoff of $78,073.

It could have been more disappointing. I could have been in Las Vegas betting the house on the Dodgers to beat the Padres on Wednesday.

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JOE HARPER, Del Mar’s top executive, couldn’t explain why the track drew a record crowd--even matched head-to-head for the first time with a Padre game beginning at the same time.

“The silicone and spandex could have been a bigger draw than the horses,” Harper surmised, and I think I know a little about first-time Lasix users and blinkers when it comes to the sport of horse racing, but I have no idea how silicone and spandex factor in. I guess I probably should get out of the press box more often.

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TIMES’ HANDICAPPER Bob Mieszerski finished Hollywood Park down an imaginary $165.20. After one day at Del Mar, Misery is another imaginary $13 in the hole. At this rate, the Times is going to run out of imaginary money.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from Ian:

“Do you consider yourself a journalist? You give Plaschke such a hard time, but you couldn’t come close to filling his shoes.”

So you’ve noticed his big feet, too.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com

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