This angry bird may be seeking to avenge his turkey cousins

I hope this police blotter bulletin in the Laguna News-Post doesn’t spread panic throughout the community. It says: “Nido Way, 2600 block.... A caller reported a large hummingbird flying aggressively around a residence.”

When’s someone going to bring some law and order to that city, anyway?

Eat up! Welcome to our Thanksgiving Dining Special Section, offering such traditional delights as:

* A turkey that’s really dead (served with “garvy”) (from Shirley Levinson).

* A house where you can catch your own bird (Jean Dunbar).

* A turkey that could be pretty dry by Dec. 25 (Gerald Van Vleet).

* A holiday special that’s not so special (Jim Burke).

* An alternative for vegetarians (John Goodlad).

Choose one of the above and I don’t think you need to worry about overeating on turkey day.

The hat man speaks: The other day I mentioned that a man was shot with a Taser gun after allegedly scuffling with police at a City Council meeting in Saginaw, Mich. Source of the dispute: His refusal to doff his Dodgers hat to comply with a council rule (the rule says that men must remove all headgear, not just Dodgers hats).

Anyway, the suspect, Charles Littleton, 22, has now given his side of the story to WJRT-TV of Saginaw. Though charged with two felonies and a misdemeanor, he claims he didn’t resort to violence, “never kicked, punched, swung or anything like that.”

His attitude toward his hat was a matter of principle.

“It means more than just a hat,” he explained. “It’s like my crown. It’s like asking a king to remove his crown.”

Littleton, who was attending the City Council meeting for a college sociology class, said the no-chapeau edict is discriminatory.

If he were “a Jewish man -- would you ask me to remove my yarmulke?” he said. “But I guess a Los Angeles Dodgers hat is not a religious symbol. That is secular. You respect religion but you don’t respect this.”

He might get some support on one point from Tommy Lasorda, the ex-Dodger manager. Lasorda has expressed the belief many times that God is a Dodger.

miscelLAny: Funnyman Phil Proctor noticed that an article in the publication Skeptical Briefs about early American nostrums made reference to a liniment called “Doc Wizard’s Original Snake Oil Elixir.” What made it special? It contained “Aged L.A. Tap Water.” The label gave the discomfiting (at least for Angelenos) warning: “Danger: Not Fit for Human Consumption.”

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.