TWO-MINUTE DRILL
at Cincinnati 16, Kansas City 6: Coaches Lewis and Edwards meet at midfield, console each other with “At least we don’t coach the Lions.”
at Atlanta 31, St. Louis 27: Jim Haslett was 2-10 after replacing Scott Linehan as Rams coach, so that worked out really well.
New England 13, at Buffalo 0: He’d never admit it, but you have to figure some small part of Tom Brady is pleased Patriots didn’t make playoffs.
at Green Bay 31, Detroit 21: Next season, Lions have decided to replace their current logo with a picture of Snagglepuss.
at Indianapolis 23, Tennessee 0: Do ticket holders feel robbed after paying full price to watch a game that mainly features backups?
at Baltimore 27, Jacksonville 7: Did anyone before the season predict a team led by a guy named Flacco would be in the playoffs?
at Houston 31, Chicago 24: OK, who would win this matchup: the 2008 Bears or Coach Ditka? Coach Ditka, 49-0.
Oakland 31, at Tampa Bay 24: A confused Al Davis is not only happy his team won, he is happy Marcus Allen didn’t play a single down.
at Pittsburgh 31, Cleveland 0: After being held without a TD for 24 quarters, Browns’ offense says it thought NFL was folding, not the AFL.
at San Francisco 27, Washington 24: Redskins claim all the excitement over the Obama inauguration distracted them last half of the season.
at Minnesota 20, N.Y. Giants 19: A one-point win over the Giants’ second-stringers isn’t exactly a confidence builder heading into the postseason.
Carolina 33, at New Orleans 31: Panthers are only 8-0 team at home this year, which means they’ll probably lose first home playoff game.
Miami 24, at N.Y. Jets 17: Rumor has it that Brett Favre is considering retirement. Or not. But he might. Then again, he might not. It’s hard to say.
at Arizona 34, Seattle 21: Cardinals raise the hopes of their fans just enough to make their eventual loss in the playoffs really disappointing.
at Philadelphia 44, Dallas 6: Tony Romo is now 5-8 in December. Jessica Simpson thinks that’s cute because that’s how tall she is in heels.
at San Diego 52, Denver 21: The last time someone folded as badly as Denver was when Edward Scissorhands tried to make a paper airplane.
-- Houston Mitchell
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