Sam Farmer’s NFL picks: Week 7

So I’m in a press box last Sunday and my phone rings. It’s my wife.

“How are you doing?” she asks.

“Pretty good,” I say. “Parking was kind of a hassle, but . . .”

“No,” she stops me. “I mean how are you doing with your picks?”

I can’t get away from it. It isn’t just readers giving me a hard time about my bad NFL picks, I get it at home too. When I walk through the door on Monday, there it is: Friday’s paper marked up with red pen, the correct picks circled and the wrong ones crossed out. She only wants to be helpful, I know, but sometimes I wish the recycling truck came on Sundays.

I don’t recall my wedding vows being, “I promise to love, honor, respect and forecast accurately.”

Then again, how are we supposed to pick these games? The NFL is wacky this season. Who could have guessed St. Louis would win its first game at Washington? Or that Cleveland would knock off the mighty New York Giants? Or that Dallas would lose at Arizona? (For those keeping score at home, I nailed that one.)

It could be worse. After all, these prognostications are just for fun. There isn’t real money -- at least not mine -- riding on these educated guesses. I mean, look at the stock market. The only Jones who had a worse week than Dow was Pacman.

So it’s all in good fun.

I did get an e-mail from a reader this week telling me it was pathetic how I had eight losers and only six winners last Sunday. He offered to make my picks for me. Said he used to do it for a living.

And he was right: My picks last week were pretty sad. But I didn’t go 6-8, I went 7-7. So I asked him to list the eight games I got wrong. He gleefully prattled off my boneheaded picks, starting with Minnesota.

I wrote back to inform him that the Vikings didn’t lose, they won, and now I understand why he used to do this for a living.

And that brings me to this: No matter how many games I get wrong on Sunday, I promise to tell you with 100% accuracy Monday who actually won and lost.

I’ll even go back and write that into my wedding vows.

San Diego at Buffalo: Tough as it is for West Coast teams to win on the other side of the country, the Chargers will roll against a Buffalo defense that gave up 41 points to Arizona. Pick: San Diego.

New Orleans at Carolina: This all depends on which Saints show up. New Orleans is getting healthier, and Drew Brees & Co. should be able to outscore the defense-minded Panthers. Pick: New Orleans.

Minnesota at Chicago: Considering their personnel on offense, the Vikings should be putting more points on the board. The Bears, coming off a heartbreaking loss at Atlanta, are happy to be home. Pick: Chicago.

Pittsburgh at Cincinnati: The only way the Steelers lose here is if they overlook their winless opponent, and Coach Mike Tomlin won’t let that happen. Pick: Pittsburgh.

Tennessee at Kansas City: The undefeated Titans are good, but are they the best team in the league? That’s up for debate. But if they can avoid the trap that snared Denver in K.C., they should be fine. Pick: Tennessee.

Baltimore at Miami: The Dolphins are on the rise, and the same can’t be said of the Ravens, who followed up their strong start with three consecutive losses. Pick: Miami.

San Francisco at New York Giants: In the last three games, the 49ers have surrendered 31, 30 and 40 points. Not the best time to be facing the defending Super Bowl champs. Pick: New York Giants.

Dallas at St. Louis: With or without Tony Romo, Dallas should be able to brush aside the Rams. If they can’t, the Cowboys are in even worse shape than we thought. Pick: Dallas.

Detroit at Houston: As if things weren’t bad enough for the Lions, now they’ve lost their quarterback and one of their top receivers. Houston is still riding high from last Sunday’s victory. Pick: Houston.

Indianapolis at Green Bay: This is the most evenly matched game of the week. The pressure is on Peyton Manning, especially since he won’t have Joseph Addai. Still, he’s up to the challenge. Pick: Indianapolis.

New York Jets at Oakland: The temptation here is to go with the Jets, but they typically haven’t played well on the West Coast. Oakland will return to a run-based offense and squeak one out. Pick: Oakland.

Cleveland at Washington: The Browns are coming off a potentially season-saving victory and a short week. Washington needs to recover from a loss that shouldn’t have happened. I like the Browns to keep it rolling. Pick: Cleveland.

Seattle at Tampa Bay: Once again, Jeff Garcia is proving he’s outstanding at parachuting in and helping a team realize its potential. The Seahawks, meanwhile, are just bad. Pick: Tampa Bay.

Denver at New England: Denver’s scoring has dropped off as defensive coordinators have gotten more accustomed to the play-calling of Denver coordinator Jeremy Bates. Beat up as they are, the Patriots will hold on at home. Pick: New England.

Record to date: 49-39.

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sam.farmer@latimes.com