Football a Give-and-Take Deal With Bills’ Smerlas

They say it takes one to know one, and they might be right. Here are a couple of items from the latest Sporting News:

Said Buffalo Bills nose tackle Fred Smerlas, playing the Seattle Seahawks: “They hold a lot. They roll up; they chop block. They try to get away with as much as they can.”

Said Green Bay Packers guard Ron Hallstrom of Smerlas after a game against Buffalo: “He jumped offside, then carried through and hit me, which was a cheap shot. Later he punched me in the stomach. He punched Keith Woodside in the stomach. He grabbed my face mask and twisted my head.”

Add Sporting News: Of linebacker Chris Morgan, it said: “He’s the latest member of the Minnesota Vikings to tempt fate--and lose his job. In the 1980s, every player who has been seated closest to trainer Fred Zamberletti in the annual team photo has been cut. In 1984, backup quarterback Steve Dils was so unhappy on the bench that he requested to sit next to Zamberletti. Shortly thereafter, Dils was traded to the Rams.”


Trivia Time: What happened to the only other USC team to face Notre Dame and Michigan after beating UCLA to stay undefeated? (Answer to follow.)

How devoted are Washington Redskins fans? Says Washington Phil Hochberg, a lawyer who is the public address announcer at RFK Stadium: “When I was a little kid, I used to be depressed for the better part of a week when the Redskins lost. Now that I’m an adult, a contributing member of society, a member of the bar, I’m usually over it by Wednesday--Thursday at the latest.”

From Phil Mushnick of the New York Post: “OK, George Bush is in. So, we’re doubling our bet that Peter (He’s Not In Today) Ueberroth will become a member of Bush’s cabinet. If Uebberoth’s secretary ever tells you he’ll call back after 9, find out if that means 9 o’clock or 9 holes.”

Wrote Bob Ryan of the Boston Globe after the New York Knicks’ opener at Madison Square Garden: “On a night when the celebrity roll included Bill Cosby, Billy Crystal, Gregory Hines, Darryl Strawberry, Carl Banks and Miss Universe Portnip Nakhirunkanok (Miss Thailand), the biggest ovation by far went to Jackie Joyner-Kersee.”


For What It’s Worth: From the Associated Press: “Tony Dorsett has 575 yards rushing this season. If he gains another 175 yards, the Broncos will have to send the Dallas Cowboys a third-round draft choice, in accordance with the conditional trade that sent Dorsett to Denver.”

From Edmonton Oilers Co-Coach John Muckler, claiming the stick work in the NHL this season is tame compared with the old days in the American and Eastern leagues: “I remember Larry Zeidel and another guy breaking the shafts of their sticks in a fight. Then they threw the shafts at each other like spears.”

New York Rangers Coach Michel Bergeron, on communicating with Czechoslovakian player Igor Liba: “I showed him the puck. It’s black for everyone. I showed him the net. I think he got the idea.”

Trivia Answer: In 1947, after beating UCLA, 6-0, for its third straight shutout, unbeaten and once-tied USC lost to Notre Dame, 38-7, in the season finale at the Coliseum and to Michigan, 49-0, in the Rose Bowl.


Pat Quinn, an Irish policeman, after watching Boston College beat Army, 38-24, in a football game at Dublin: “I got tired of those whistles blowing all the time. I never did know what they were whistling about.”