Regarding the Big Match, Anyone Can Hazard a Guess

His name is Wes. He sells hand grenades. Dummy grenades, that is, at $5.95 a pop. As a cashier at a Newport Beach Army-Navy surplus store, Wes has to deal with a variety of questions: How much for the dog tags? Where’s the camouflage? Do these handcuffs come with keys? It isn’t too often a question stumps him.

So, who do you think will win Saturday night, Corona del Mar or Newport Harbor?

Granted, it might have caught him off guard. But come on. This was the State Division I volleyball final we were talking about, the one going on Saturday at Cal State Fullerton. Corona del Mar versus Newport Harbor. The nation’s No. 1 versus the nation’s No. 2. The match everyone in Newport Beach is abuzz about.

Well, almost everyone. Wes admitted he didn’t know a thing about it, but offered a prediction nonetheless.

“I’ll take Newport Harbor,” he said. “They just seem more, well . . . volleyball-oriented.”

And so it went. For two hours Thursday morning, we surveyed people in Newport Beach for insights on this oh-so-significant event. We sought predictions from Balboa Island to the Wedge to the shores of the Upper Back Bay. The overwhelming response?

“Uh, what was that again?”

A sampling:

Dorothy of Dorothy’s Foot Shoppe in Corona del Mar: “I don’t get into volleyball. Ask me about hockey.” (We did. Dorothy is a Kings’ fan).

Sgt. Howard Mol, watch commander of the Orange County Harbor Patrol: “I don’t follow the sport, so I wouldn’t want to predict. But Corona del Mar will probably win because we’re in their end of the harbor.”

Jim, the manager of Haagen-Dazs at Fashion Island, picks Corona del Mar because his cousin attended the school. He also informed us that vanilla still ranks No. 1 among ice cream eaters.

Krystal, a Newport Beach psychic, wasn’t in the mood to chit-chat. “I have a client now, dear. I have to go.” Please, we said. Just one measly prediction. “OK,” she said. “Newport.”

Fortunately, a few actually knew about the upcoming match. Or at least knew volleyball. In 1971, Rick Collier played on the first boys’ volleyball team in Corona del Mar history, a team that played Army, among others, because there were so few high school teams to compete against. Now, Collier is a manager of a Newport Beach marine equipment store. Rick picked Corona del Mar to win. “They’re going to put the roof on all their hits,” he said. In other words, the Sea Kings will block exquisitely.

Sgt. Fred Heinecke of the Newport Beach Police Department doesn’t see it that way. His daughter, Mary, plays volleyball for Woodbridge, which played both teams this season. “I’m going to go out on a limb and go with Harbor,” he said. “They’ve got that Misty May. She’s a strong player.”

True, but Don Moothart, general manager of the city’s Ferrari dealership, believes it will come down to coaching--Corona del Mar’s. “Lance Stewart’s too tough to beat. Corona del Mar in five,” he said.

If we were to consider an outside opinion, we might go with Michael Soylular’s. He is the coach at Laguna Beach, and in trying to beat both teams, has analyzed them thoroughly. Corona del Mar has the better setting, he said. Newport Harbor has the most dominant player in May. Corona del Mar has the height advantage. Newport Harbor’s Melissa Schutz is the better middle blocker. Corona de Mar won the State Division I last season and thus has the experience. Newport lost the Southern Section title to Corona del Mar a few weeks ago and will be hungry for revenge . . . He’s going with Newport Harbor in four.

But forget outsiders. This is a locals-only poll. That’s why we went to the dean of volleyball in this city, Charlie Brande. As coach of the club team that includes players from Newport Harbor and Corona del Mar, Brande knows of what he speaks. Problem is, he’s not speaking. Not on this issue, anyway. Not when he has a stake in both sides. Brande’s only prediction? “The first one that gets to 15, wins.” Chicken.

Finally, we spoke to the mayor of Newport Beach, Clarence Turner, who despite having two children who attended Newport Harbor, said: “Well, the way I see it, Newport Beach wins regardless, no matter what happens.” Give the mayor a hand. He wins the Wimpy Award.

Personally, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. Newport Harbor in five games. Easy.

I wonder if I can get a camouflage suit in my size.

Barbie Ludovise’s column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Ludovise by writing her at The Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, 92626, by calling (714) 966-5847 or by fax at 966-5663.