WEEK 9 BREAKDOWN

BALTIMORE AT ATLANTA

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Atlanta by 7 1/2

Quick slant: Michael Vick -- you can’t stop him, you can only hope to fine him.

Plot: Vick is one of the best things to happen to pro football in recent years, certainly the best thing to happen to Atlanta Falcon football. When the NFL should be celebrating the closest thing it has ever had to Michael Jordan, it instead bogs itself down in petty, over-officious minutiae: After leading the Falcons to a thrilling, 37-35 victory over the Saints last week, Vick was fined $5,000 for wearing his white socks too low and $2,500 for tossing a football to a fan after a touchdown. Such is the lot of being a marked man. This stuff never happens to Raven quarterbacks.

Monday’s headline: “NFL Fines Vick for Running Too Fast”

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NEW ENGLAND AT BUFFALO

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Buffalo by 2 1/2

Quick slant: Repeat after me: Never trade a franchise quarterback within your division.

Plot: How many of you thought New England’s trading of Drew Bledsoe to Buffalo would come back to bite the Patriots this season? OK, hands down. You too, Tom Brady. Brady hasn’t been bad; he’s on pace to throw for 4,000 yards and 30 touchdowns. But he hasn’t been good enough to win a game in his last four tries.

Bledsoe, meanwhile, has been the league’s first-half MVP while leading the Bills to a 5-3 start.

It didn’t have to be this way. New England could have traded Bledsoe to Cincinnati.

Monday’s headline: “Ex-Patriot Leads Dumb Patriots By 2 1/2 Games in Standings”

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PHILADELPHIA AT CHICAGO

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

TV: Channel 11

The line: Philadelphia by 6 1/2

Quick slant: With fog lifted, we can see: Bears are really bad.

Plot: Much pregame angst in Chicago over this one, to the tune of: Why can’t we get a quarterback like Donovan McNabb? The Bears are 2-5 with the worst pitching rotation in Chicago: Jim Miller (backup forced into a starter’s role), Chris Chandler (backup forced to play when Miller developed tendinitis; went 0-2 against Lions and Vikings) and Henry Burris (played last five minutes against Vikings; finished with a passer rating of 6.9). McNabb, meanwhile, had his second 100-yard rushing game of the season against the Giants.

Monday’s headline: “Hope for Bears: If They Keep Losing, Maybe They Can Draft Leftwich”

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PITTSBURGH AT CLEVELAND

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Pittsburgh by 3

Quick slant: Last chance for Browns.

Plot: It appears the Steelers scrapped Kordell Stewart just in time. With Tommy Maddox dinking teams into submission, the Steelers have won their last three -- and if the Browns can’t stop them here, they should keep on rolling through a schedule that has Atlanta, Tennessee, Cincinnati, Jacksonville, Houston and Carolina neatly lined up for them. Cleveland is back at .500 after Tim Couch rallied the Browns from a 21-3 deficit against the Jets last week. That’s right, it’s the 4-3 Steelers vs. the 4-4 Browns. In the AFC North, that’s as good as it gets.

Monday’s headline: “Browns Rally Again; Cowher: ‘Just a Speed Bump in the Road’ ”

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DALLAS AT DETROIT

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Detroit by 3

Quick slant: Emmitt has the record that should have been Barry’s. But Detroit isn’t bitter.

Plot: How many yards would Barry Sanders have had if he hadn’t decided to take his record run and go home before the 1999 season? New NFL career rushing leader Emmitt Smith says he thought Sanders was capable of “not only getting the record but blowing it away and setting it in the 20,000-yard area.” Sunday, Smith brings his record to Ford Field, flaunting it for all of Detroit to see. When asked if he thought Detroit would be OK with it, Smith told the Detroit Free Press, “They have no choice but to be OK with it. People in Detroit love me too. There are Cowboys fans everywhere.”

Monday’s headline: “Lions’ Victory Not Much of a Consolation Prize”

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CINCINNATI AT HOUSTON

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Houston by 3

Quick slant: Yes, Houston by 3.

Plot: So it has come to this for the never-say-rock-bottom Bengals -- they are three-point underdogs to an expansion team. In his latest desperate attempt to rally his lost causes, Bengal Coach Dick LeBeau began the week by predicting victory over the seven-game-old Texans. Fired up, Bengal receiver Chad Johnson went a step further and guaranteed a victory. Uh-oh. By midweek, LeBeau had taken another look at his quarterback depth chart, prompting something of a backtrack: “You would probably be surprised to hear this, but I predict a victory for us every week.” Long story short: Same old same old.

Monday’s headline: “For Next Act, 0-8 LeBeau Predicts He’ll Be Bengal Coach in 2003”

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TENNESSEE AT INDIANAPOLIS

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Indianapolis by 3

Quick slant: Just when you thought it was safe to forget the Titans.

Plot: No one’s out of the race in the AFC (Gone) South. Not the expansion Texans, who could pull to within a game of first place. Not the Titans, who were 1-4 and recently talking about a coaching change. Since then, the Colts have dropped road games at Pittsburgh and Washington, with Tennessee getting back-to-back 100-yard performances from Eddie George in wins over Jacksonville and Cincinnati. A Titan win in Indianapolis would leave the Titans and Colts tied at 4-4 -- one of them a serious threat to win the division title at 8-8.

Monday’s headline: “How ‘Bout That Realignment, Say .500 First-Place Titans”

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MINNESOTA AT TAMPA BAY

Kickoff: Sunday, 10 a.m.

The line: Tampa Bay by 7

Quick slant: Jon Gruden? Excitable boy, they all said.

Plot: One week after Arizona’s 9-6 overtime win over Dallas set football back 40 years, Tampa Bay’s 12-9 triumph over Carolina knocked it back another decade. Still, Buccaneer Coach Gruden was pumped after watching Martin Gramatica save his offense with four field goals, two longer than 50 yards. Gruden described Gramatica as “a weapon. He’s Barry Bonds. I say it every day. Put the ball down, protect him and he’s going to hit three-run homers.” To prove his point, Gruden tried tossing a few game balls Gramatica’s way. You guessed it. Four wide ones.

Monday’s headline: “Gramatica Goes Deep Again; Still Hasn’t Won the Big One”

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NEW YORK JETS AT SAN DIEGO

Kickoff: Sunday, 1 p.m.

TV: Channel 2

The line: San Diego by 7 1/2

Quick slant: Mutiny in the Meadowlands.

Plot: It’s all happiness and joy in San Diego, where the Chargers are doing great things after borrowing the St. Louis-Baltimore-New England playbook and mounting the NFL’s latest, obligatory worst-to-first campaign. Not so in New Jersey, where the Jets blew a 21-3 lead to Cleveland last week, leaving Coach Herman Edwards to angrily lash out at media allegations that his 2-5 team has quit. “You don’t quit in sports,” Edwards said. “You retire. You don’t get to quit. It’s not an option ... When you lose, people start assuming they quit. Retirement? Yes. Quitting? No.”

Monday’s headline: “Jets Come to San Diego to Retire”

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ST. LOUIS AT ARIZONA

Kickoff: Sunday, 1:15 p.m.

The line: St. Louis by 3

Quick slant: Why Anaheim has a World Series champion but no NFL team.

Plot: It all began in 1988, when the Cardinals moved to Arizona, leaving St. Louis without a football team and desperate enough to do anything to get another, including rolling out the red carpet for Georgia Frontiere in 1995. So while Orange County fans wring the stale champagne out of their rally monkeys, they might amuse themselves by watching their old Rams, sounding very familiar at 2-5, trying to climb back within one game of the Cardinals in the NFC West standings. It’s Marc Bulger vs. Jake Plummer.

Monday’s headline: “Rams Rally to Win; Michael Eisner on Hand to Take Credit”

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SAN FRANCISCO AT OAKLAND

Kickoff: Sunday, 1:15 p.m.

TV: Channel 11

The line: Oakland by 3

Quick slant: Jerry Rice re-assesses his big career move.

Plot: In 1 1/2 seasons since moving across the Bay, former 49er Jerry Rice has turned 40 and, frankly, is starting to resemble a grouchy old man. Last week, after fumbling to set up Kansas City’s winning score, Rice complained he wasn’t getting the ball enough. This prompted an exasperated Raider quarterback Rich Gannon to tell reporters, “I threw it 55 times today. I think everyone got their chances..” Meanwhile, the 49ers put Jeff Garcia in the shotgun against Arizona and Terrell Owens got his 132 yards. Guess who’s not complaining ?

Monday’s headline: “From 4-0 to 4-4, Raiders Pine for the Good Old Days”

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WASHINGTON AT SEATTLE

Kickoff: Sunday, 1:15 p.m.

The line: Seattle by 2 1/2

Quick slant: Shameless in Seattle.

Plot: With good soldier Trent Dilfer having taken one too many for the team -- he’s sidelined for the season with a torn Achilles’ -- Seahawk Coach Mike Holmgren has decided to share a foxhole with Jeff George, who was signed this week. Better strategies are out there, though Holmgren swears it’s only to provide “backup sup- port” for Matt Hasselbeck. The Redskins have been down that road, which is why Marty Schot- tenheimer is now in San Diego and three quarterbacks not named George now play for Wash- ington.

Monday’s headline: “Flash! George Contributes to Redskin Victory!”

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NEW YORK JETS AT SAN DIEGO

Kickoff: Sunday, 1 p.m.

TV: Channel 2

The line: San Diego by 7 1/2

Quick slant: Mutiny in the Meadowlands.

Plot: It’s all happiness and joy in San Diego, where the Chargers are doing great things after borrowing the St. Louis-Baltimore-New England playbook and mounting the NFL’s latest, obligatory worst-to-first campaign. Not so in New Jersey, where the Jets blew a 21-3 lead to Cleveland last week, leaving Coach Herman Edwards to angrily lash out at media allegations that his 2-5 team has quit. “You don’t quit in sports,” Edwards said. “You retire. You don’t get to quit. It’s not an option ... When you lose, people start assuming they quit. Retirement? Yes. Quitting? No.”

Monday’s headline: “Jets Come to San Diego to Retire”

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MIAMI AT GREEN BAY

Kickoff: Monday, 6 p.m.

TV: Channel 7

The line: Green Bay by 4 1/2

Quick slant: How Favre is he willing to go to save the streak?

Plot: Green Bay’s Brett Favre has started 164 games in a row at quarterback, an NFL record. He also has a sprained knee that forced him out of the Packers’ Oct. 13 game. With the Packers holding a four-game lead in the NFC North, some have called for Favre to give the streak a rest and focus on the big picture -- a possible Super Bowl for Green Bay. Favre, however, sees the bright Monday night lights and can’t stay away. His streak is different from Cal Ripken’s; Favre has yet to play a game to pad the streak at his team’s expense. On the other hand, Miami starts Ray Lucas.

Tuesday’s headline: “Favre, Lucas Pass for Four Packer Scores”