Text messages from press row . . .

LSU and Oklahoma delivered their opening statements. . . .

Now it’s USC’s turn. . . .

Looking at a list of USC’s and UCLA’s remaining opponents this season, it’s hard not to notice that the one with the worst record is Notre Dame. . . .

Who scheduled this cupcake? . . .

It’s too bad the New England Patriots can’t play the Indianapolis Colts in the Super Bowl. . . .

It also doesn’t seem right that the Boston Red Sox can’t play the New York Yankees in the World Series or that the Phoenix Suns can’t play the San Antonio Spurs in the NBA Finals. . . .

Seeding makes sense. . . .

While Randy Moss seems destined for a career rebirth with the Patriots, the Oakland Raiders seem headed for another forgettable season. . . .

Junior Seau might have a future as a fullback. . . .

As Bart Simpson might say, watching Rex Grossman is just gross, man. . . .

Some Lakers fans might question the finger-pointing methods of Kobe Bryant and Phil Jackson, but most probably agree with their message. . . .

Why was Michael Jordan a no-show at Jackson’s Hall of Fame induction? Ditto Scottie Pippen, Shaquille O’Neal and Bryant. . . .

Being a self-described “Kobe-stopper” has not stopped former Lakers draft pick Ruben Patterson from being shipped around the NBA, but that doesn’t mean the nine-year veteran wasn’t an intriguing pickup by the Clippers. . . .

Alex Rodriguez, he of the .318 batting average, .672 slugging percentage, 52 home runs and 140 runs batted in, might be the American League’s most valuable player even if he sat out the rest of the season. . . .

And to think that Yankees fans booed him on opening day. . . .

Suddenly it doesn’t seem so harebrained that the Dodgers put faith in David Wells, cut loose by the San Diego Padres, to bolster their playoff hopes. . . .

Boomer sooner might have helped them to a division title. . . .

In response to a list of Vin Scully’s favorite books, reader Peter Rich wonders if Dodgers General Manager Ned Colletti’s favorite movie is “Cocoon,” the 1985 film “where old people are greeted by aliens who make them young again.” . . .

Rick Ankiel’s feel-good story doesn’t feel so good anymore. . . .

Since Novak Djokovic’s impersonations of Maria Sharapova and Rafael Nadal are so spot on, you’d guess that he also must do a pretty good Robert De Niro, who sat in the Serb’s box Sunday during his U.S. Open final loss to Roger Federer. . . .

As Travis Bickle memorably asked, “You talkin’ to me?”. . .

Only one of the last 19 U.S. Open men’s singles finals has gone to five sets, Andre Agassi outlasting Todd Martin in 1999, and none of the last 12 women’s finals has gone to three. . . .

Note to Serena Williams: Justine Henin’s resume includes seven Grand Slam singles titles, which adds up to an awful lot of lucky shots. . . .

NASCAR’s Chase for the Nextel Cup, which kicks off Sunday with the Sylvania 300 at Loudon, N.H., won’t be called the Junior circuit. . . .

Dale Earnhardt Jr. has missed the cut twice in three years. . . .

Newly crowned IndyCar Series champion Dario Franchitti should be a welcome addition to NASCAR, as should wife Ashley Judd. . . .

Oscar De La Hoya is scheduled to begin work today on an autobiography, titled “American Son,” but if the Golden Boy’s memoir is anything like his never-ending boxing career, the final chapter might not be written for years. . . .

Actually, the book is due in 2008. . . .

With ballyhooed recruit O.J. Mayo in the fold this season, USC basketball Coach Tim Floyd upgraded the schedule, dotting the Trojans’ calendar with games against Oklahoma, Kansas and Memphis. . . .

“We’re taking the approach that Arizona does,” Floyd says. “They’ve been the one team in the conference that has always tried to play a high-profile schedule.” . . .

USC walk-on James Dunleavy is a son of Clippers Coach Mike Dunleavy and younger brother of Indiana Pacers forward Mike Dunleavy Jr. . . .

It would have been less painful for UC Irvine to lose baseball coach Dave Serrano to Oregon’s unlimited resources than to Cal State Fullerton’s tradition. . . .

The Anteaters thought they’d started their own tradition.

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jerome.crowe@latimes.com