The Times’ top-25 college football rankings

Nothing could be finer than to be in (South) Carolina as Steve Spurrier’s Gamecocks rocket six spots to No. 3, which is on the way to a showdown of the unbeatens against top-ranked Alabama.

West Virginia looks like the team to beat in the Big 12 Conference after giving up only 108 points in its first two conference games. Louisiana State clings to the top 10 despite the nation’s No. 76-ranked offense, but that’s actually better than No. 7 Florida’s ranking of 88. Remember, defense always wins championships in the Southeastern Conference. Auburn proved it two years ago with its No. 54-ranked unit.

Five new teams in the poll this week left Rankman scrambling for comment filler, but “Ask Jeeves for Kids” proved to be an invaluable resource.

1. Alabama 5-0; Saban speaks to fast-food convention during bye week: “Is this what we want French fries to be?” (1)

2. Oregon; 6-0; That didn’t look like a UW the Ducks squished last weekend. It looked like a VW (bug). (2)

3. South Carolina 6-0; Kin of Chicken Curse creator “Pitchfork” Ben Tillman urges Clemson to lay down all farm utensils. (9)

4. West Virginia 5-0; Texas cowhand screamed at Bevo: “Grab your kids and drive as fast as you can to Abilene! “ (4)

5. Kansas State 5-0; Snyder leads Solich and Spurrier in early-bird AARP coach-of-the-year voting. (5)

6. Notre Dame 5-0; Vatican allows Church of ESPN GameDay to set up near mural of “Touchdown Jesus.” (10)

7. Florida 5-0; Said being third team in less than year to hold Louisiana State without a touchdown was “really no big deal.” (13)

8. USC 4-1; Three Trojans earn “Star [Lotulelei] of the Week” stickers for finally blocking Utah’s nose tackle. (13)

9. Oregon State 4-0; Coach tells Beavers to keep their heads and tails up after injury to QB Mannion. (12)

10. Louisiana State 5-1; “Swamp things” arrive back in Baton Rouge after bogging down in Florida. (6)

11. Ohio State 6-0; “Dear AP voter: Urban Meyer wishes you and your family a very happy Columbus Day.” (14)

12. Texas 4-1; Holding West Virginia to 48 points earned DE Alex Okafor Big 12 defensive player of week — really. (7)

13. Oklahoma 3-1; Stoops says he has never tried the deep-fried Mack Brownies at Texas State Fair. (15)

14. Florida State 5-1; Movie trailer for “Jimbo!”: “Just when you thought it was safe to go back into a sports book.” (3)

15. Georgia 5-1; Dawgs now have worse record than another team from Athens … Ohio. (8)

16. Clemson 5-1; Seeing South Carolina Gamecocks at No. 3 prompts team to flame broil 20 pounds of chicken. (16)

17. Stanford 4-1; Indianapolis Colts QB Andrew Luck phones old team: “You wouldn’t believe the comeback we had last weekend.” (19)

18. Rutgers 5-0; Marketing plan now is to attract disenfranchised fans of the New York Jets. (21)

19. Louisville 6-0; Road-weary Gas House Gang washes out gray flannels in sink before Pittsburgh game near old Forbes Field. (22)

20. Louisiana Tech 5-0; First time in USA Today rankings but has been top 25 in Ruston Pennysaver since 1982. (25)

21. Boise State 4-1; Time spent away from poll allowed team to do some “soul searching” up at Rankman Pond. (NR)

22. Texas A&M; 4-1; Clincher for many Aggies recruits was chance to play Louisiana Tech this week in Shreveport. (NR)

23. Cincinnati 4-0; Seven-game winning streak believed to be longest for football school nicknamed the “Bearcats.” (NR)

24. Mississippi State 5-0; Granted sponsor’s exemption to become third school nicknamed “Bulldogs” in this week’s poll. (NR)

25. Arizona State 4-1; Mud on rankings lower fairway necessitates weekly winter rules of “lift, clean and replace.” (NR)

Dropped out: Texas Christian (17), Washington (18), UCLA (20), Northwestern (23), Nebraska (24).

Moved in: Boise State, Texas A&M;, Cincinnati, Mississippi State, Arizona State.

chris.dufresne@latimes.com