Rory McIlroy somehow wins a major while dating someone famous

Rory McIlroy has freed us all!

By crushing the field at the PGA Championship this weekend, McIlroy has dismissed the silly notion that a bad game or a slump by an elite athlete has anything at all to do with his or her romantic involvement with someone beautiful and famous.

Going into the PGA, McIlroy was in the midst of a rather shaky season. He had missed the cut at three tournaments, including the U.S. Open, where he was the defending champion. Naturally, many people said his spotty play had everything to do with his relationship with tennis player Caroline Wozniacki.

Then, tied for the lead with more than one round remaining the next day, McIlroy stayed up late watching his girlfriend play in the Rogers Cup. Can you imagine what the critics would have said if he hadn’t smoked everyone Sunday with a bogey-free six-under-par 66 in the final round?

McIlroy could.

“To be honest, it did motivate me,” he said. “I did want to go out there and prove a few people wrong. That’s what I did.”

If they were still together, Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson would be thanking McIlroy.

If they were still together, Matt Kemp and Rihanna would be thanking McIlroy.

If they actually were/are together, Kate Upton and Mark Sanchez and/or Justin Verlander would be thanking McIlroy.

Instead, I’ll do it.

Thank you, Rory McIlroy! Now we can all go on with our lives.

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Eight is more than enough for Rory McIlroy to win the PGA Championship