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Tennis : Warner’s Brazen Challenge Ends in Meltdown

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Sam Farmer

A group of five doubles teams from Cabrillo Racquet Club played host to and defeated a contingent from Warner Center Club, 3-2, Saturday in a challenge match initiated by Warner pro Doug Doss.

You remember Doss. He’s the one who issued this bold prediction a week ago: “We’re going to go up there and slime (Cabrillo). That’s on the record. They’ve got new courts but it doesn’t matter if we play them on cow dung, we’ll still beat them.”

The Warner team arrived at Cabrillo wearing new, red T-shirts with Warner Center Challenge printed on the front. Next, as in bring on the next victim, was emblazoned on the back.

Before the matches, Cabrillo pro Wayne Bryan apologized to the crowd for producing such a rag-tag Cabrillo team. “I told them we’d be lucky to win a couple of games,” he said.

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After the matches, Bryan noticed that the ink on the new T-shirts had begun to run.

“Literally and figuratively, it was like they were bleeding,” he said, laughing. “Tears. Blood tears.”

Despite all the blood tears and sweat, Bryan maintains that the victory was lucky.

“Doug wants a rematch in September but I’ve just noticed that our club calendar is full to the year 2000,” he quipped. “They may have to rot with that match.”

Rot? That bears a striking resemblance to Doss’ description of Cabrillo’s Supreme courts, which are topped with a polyurethane surface that is slightly softer than cement.

“Wayne’s a great host but those courts were like walking in a theater with Jujubes on the floor,” he quipped. “I felt like I was playing in India. He played us no-ad games so it gave us less time to get used to the courts.”

As for Bryan’s booking problems?

“If he’s lucky, he’ll stall us to the year 2000,” Doss said.

Nuggets of wisdom: Kirstin Smith of Thousand Oaks teamed with Laura Richards of Orange County to win the U. S Tennis Assn. girls’ 18 national hard-court doubles championship Sunday at the Peninsula Tennis Club in Burlingame, Calif.

For their efforts Smith and Richards were awarded silver platters and each received the traditional solid gold tennis ball that is about the size of a marble.

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Although the prize signifies her first win on the national level, Smith won’t be strapping the nugget around her neck and parading it around Sunset Hills Country Club.

She learned her lesson last year.

In 1988, Smith and Richards finished second in the national clay-court tournament in Virginia Beach, Va., and won silver tennis balls.

Smith put the ball on a silver chain when she got home and went out to smack some balls. Instead, the silver ball smacked her , chipping a front tooth.

“(The gold ball is) staying in the box,” Smith said.

Minor leaguer: Pity poor Paul Minor.

He has been the San Fernando Valley coordinator of the U. S. Tennis Assn. Volvo amateur team tennis league for two years, has played in the league for three, and fancies himself a fairly tough player in the 4.0 division. (The National Tennis Rating Program uses a scale of 1.0 to 7.0.) Still, Minor has been unable to advance beyond the local playoffs. Sectional playoffs will be held at UCLA next month and Rita, Paul’s wife, will participate.

“It’s become a standing joke that the coordinator can’t even rig it enough to make it to UCLA,” Minor said.

Even Minor’s 16-year-old son Michael hasn’t shown much sympathy for his pop’s plight.

Michael, the No. 2 singles player at Granada Hills High, teamed with his father’s former partner, Steve Biegenzahn, to beat Minor and Michael Jamieson, 6-4, 7-5, and capture the Porter Valley Country Club doubles championship last month.

Yet another setback for the elder Minor.

“I told him that if he beats me again, he’s going to be grounded,” he quipped.

Parent-sitting: It seems that the coaches working the USTA national 12-and-under zonal team championships in Tucson, Ariz., this week would not mind making some of the participants’ parents chase a few lobs. A few deep, deep lobs.

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“The parents are a little too exuberant,” Coach Wayne Bryan said. “I recommend they sit four courts away rather than pushing their nose through the fence.”

One parent accused Pepperdine Coach Richard Gallien of relaying signals to a youngster during a match.

“Hey, I’m not smart enough to use signals,” Gallien responded.

Classes: Glendale Parks, Recreation and Community Services is conducting tennis classes for adults and children at Glorietta, Nibley, Pacific, Dunsmore and Fremont parks.

The 50-minute sessions are for players of all ability levels and include instruction in singles and doubles play.

Information: 818-956-2000.

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