If It Doesn’t Work, He Won’t Putter Around With the Thing

If Ken Green’s putter isn’t producing birdies or saving pars, he sentences it to death. Usually it’s by drowning, and he admits to sending at least seven to a watery grave.

Green, defending champion in the Canadian Open, told USA Today: “I’ve got a lot of different tosses. I’ve helicoptered some from 50 yards. I’ve got an underhanded flip, a crosshanded sling and once, in the Bank of Boston, I just quietly dropped it on a slope and watched it bounce in.”

His longest toss?

“At Pebble Beach. The ninth hole,” he said. “It must have carried 50 yards down to the beach.

“Funny thing was a guy found it and brought it to me the next year. He said it only went in about eight yards, then washed up on the beach, so he grabbed it. I thanked him and gave him a new one.”

Buddy-Buddy: Philadelphia Eagles Coach Buddy Ryan, on Randall Cunningham: “To me, Randall is the best athlete I have ever seen play (his) position. I think he is lucky to play for a coach who doesn’t make him into a stereotype quarterback. I let him run around and make up some of his plays. If he played for some offensive-minded coach, they would probably make him fit a mold, take a three-step drop or five-step drop, all that baloney.”

Trivia time: Why did Bill Russell miss the first 24 games with the Boston Celtics as a rookie in 1956-57? (Answer below.)

Hold dessert: Does Chris Evert have a chance at Wimbledon? “I’m not here for the strawberries and cream,” she said.

Not so peachy: Joe Hauser, 90, of Sheboygan, Wis., a first baseman with the Philadelphia Athletics in 1928, the year that Ty Cobb bowed out with the A’s, was asked by the Philadelphia Daily News what he thought of the Georgia Peach.

“I hated that bastard,” said Hauser. “Nobody liked him. He was an individualist. He had to be on top all the time.”

Hauser said Cobb gave him batting tips that completely ruined his swing. “It’s on your mind when you’ve got a guy like Ty Cobb trying to keep you from hitting the ball,” he said.

“One day, we were playing the Tigers, and Harry Heilmann was the runner at first. Harry said he’d never seen me so messed up. “What’s the matter, Ty bothering you?” he said.”

Heilmann, a former teammate of Cobb’s, was a four-time American League batting champion.

Add Cobb: In 1910, Chalmers Automobile Co. decided to award a car to the American League batting champion, and Cobb appeared to be a shoo-in until the last week, when Napoleon Lajoie of Cleveland dropped seven straight bunt singles in front of an overly cooperative St. Louis Browns third baseman.

Says the Sporting News: “A.L. President Ban Johnson, sensing a conspiracy against an unpopular player, overruled the statisticians and awarded the batting title, and consequently the car, to Cobb.”

Trivia answer: He was competing for the U.S. Olympic basketball team in Melbourne, Australia.

Quotebook: Kurt Rambis of the Charlotte Hornets, asked to compare playing for the Hornets after playing for the Lakers: “There was no difference. Detroit swept us, too.”