Some Read More Than Playbooks

Nothing like a Southern Section luncheon to bring out those deep, thought-provoking questions.

Such as:

“Which one is the salad fork?”

Excuse El Toro offensive lineman Matt Mason. It was his first salad.

But his table etiquette is a reminder that, yes, real people, not athletes, are involved here, whether they use eating utensils or not. Even the guys at the top.

The Dharma Bum: El Toro’s Mike Milner--stoic coach, tight-lipped quote and, yup, a beat wannabe? The same guy who is so organized he separates his bran from his flakes also has a passion for Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg? Somehow, it doesn’t fit the stereotype, either way you look at it.

Is he a beat looking for a scene? Or does he have a team he’s looking to beat?

No matter. He’ll send the best minds of El Toro’s generation on the road Friday to play Servite in the Division V title game.

If the Chargers win, Milner will become only the third coach to lead two different Orange County teams to a championship. He took Fountain Valley to the 1988 Division I title and can join Ted Mullen (Villa Park, Foothill) and Dick Hill (Santa Ana Valley, Santa Ana).

Of the three, it’s a good bet Milner is the only one who knows Neal Cassady wasn’t the 1955 Heisman Trophy winner.

Father Brown: Larry Toner stands in Milner’s way, as he did last year, when Servite beat El Toro, 34-19, in the semifinals.

G.K. Chesterton may have penned, “Each one of us as an individual is important, everybody else around is equally important,” but it sure sounds like a Toner standing order.

Toner takes pride in philosophical coaching and works in such ways. It has been a long road from Gregorian University in Rome to Santa Ana Stadium in Orange County, but Toner has brought his Chesterton with him.

Toner announced at Monday’s luncheon that he had brought, “two football players and a quarterback,” with him. A cute introduction? Or was trying to remind Greg Cicero what his job is on Friday?

A year ago, the Friars were close, real close, to their first section title since 1983. Which brings us to another Chesterton quote: “Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.”

Nothing was as bad as Servite’s passing game last season. In the final, David Martin completed one of four passes for 11 yards with one interception. The Friars lost to Newport Harbor, 20-15. You can’t run the ball every play.

So Cicero, maybe Toner was joking. Maybe not.

A fast read: Jim Kunau might complete a three-year project. He has taken Orange Lutheran from 5-5, to Division X runner-up, to another crack at the title. Quick work for a Tolstoy man.

Wonder how he’d do restructuring the county’s financial plan? Not that he deserves such a fate. One would be better off rereading “War and Peace” and it would take less time.

But the length of Kunau’s resume certainly won’t draw any comparisons to his favorite author. He had not coached a lick before coming to Orange Lutheran as an assistant in 1992. Not one drill, not one whistle. So there’s something to be said about on-the-job training.

Just one more lesson. The Lancers travel to Lancaster Antelope Valley High Saturday to face Rosamond. One more victory and the three-year plan is finished.

It’s hard to say which is more impressive. Orange Lutheran’s rise to power? Or Kunau’s development as a coach?

Has he made the Lancers? Or have they made him?

Heady stuff to ponder. So let’s keep it simple.

The salad fork is the small one.