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This Duo Can’t Be Called Dynamic

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“Bat-corker” Sammy Sosa isn’t the only celebrity whose reputation is taking a beating, much to the delight of a public that loves to see the mighty fall, wrote Greg Cote of the Miami Herald:

“There isn’t much difference today between Sosa and newly indicted Martha Stewart. Martha can’t hit a fastball. Sammy can’t make a decent parfait.

“And neither can avoid being on the wrong end of Letterman and Leno for a while.”

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More Sosa: “Sure, this is going to hurt Sammy financially,” wrote Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle, “but it will also open some doors for him. He just signed an endorsement deal with Louisville Plugger.”

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Trivia time: Before Denny McLain accomplished the feat for the Detroit Tigers in 1968, who was the last major league pitcher to win 30 games in a season?

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Foul territory: Among the canines competing for the title of Worst Dog Breath in America on June 23 in New York is Chase, a Hungarian hunting dog owned by Cincinnati college student Corin Pennella.

Chase’s breath is so bad, Pennella told the Cincinnati Enquirer, “It smells like my brother’s room.”

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Reform school: The teenager who joined his father in the on-field attack of Kansas City Royal first-base coach Tom Gamboa last season might be sentenced to six months in a boot camp.

Responded Steve Hummer of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: “That way, society can rest assured it at least will have a well-groomed, highly disciplined moron on its hands.”

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No Answer: Larry Brown has his work cut out for him in his new job as coach of the Detroit Pistons, wrote Mitch Albom of the Detroit Free-Press:

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“You are coming off six years with Allen ‘the Answer’ Iverson. I am tempted to offer you two aspirin and a pillow. But while Iverson gave you many headaches, one of them was never, ‘Who’s going to shoot, who’s going to lead, or who’s the man?’

“The team you are inheriting asks all of the above.”

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Lucky break: Former Florida State quarterback Adrian McPherson has much to be grateful for after avoiding conviction during his trial on gambling charges, wrote Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel:

“Personally, I’m just glad McPherson never played for [Washington’s] Rick Neuheisel. It’d be the first time in college football history that offensive meetings were held at a blackjack table.”

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Hot ticket: Getting a seat for a Cleveland Cavalier game is about to become considerably more difficult, predicted Randy Hill of FoxSports.com:

“The Cavaliers [will] announce that ticket requests for the family, friends and posse applicants of LeBron James have been accommodated, leaving six season tickets available for the coming season.”

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Trivia answer: Dizzy Dean of the St. Louis Cardinals in 1934.

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And finally: Although New Jersey has teams in the NBA and NHL finals, Jay Leno said “The Sopranos” are still the state’s most influential outfit:

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“According to a newspaper poll, 75% of New Jersey residents rate their state as a good or excellent place to live. The other 25% are reported missing.”

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