- Mighty Moose
- THE HOUSE
- The Wonder Shows : Panel of teens rate the shows the networks make for them
- Student Drowns After Raft Turns Over in River
- Come the Revolution, All Bets Are Off in Soviet Union : Soviets: Even if the Communists leave power, the nation has much more in common with the 'have-nots' than the 'haves' of the world.
- Running in L.A.
- Bald Eagle Chick Found in New Area
- 2 Bodies Found in Unrelated Killings
- 2 Unhurt in Plane's Crash-Landing : Sun Valley: A single-engine Cessna loses power just after takeoff. The flight instructor brings it down in a flood-control basin.
- Mop-Up Begins in Wake of Torrent : Flooding: The rupture of a water main damages a dozen businesses on trendy Ventura Boulevard. Apartment garages turn into underground lakes.
- BASEBALL : Winter Mouth Tip-Toes Into Oriole Camp
- He Needed Seven Pins to Win, but Winds Up a Loser in Gutter
- THE NBA / MARK HEISLER : Re-Draft: Coleman Still No. 1, Others Fade
- GYMNASTICS UCLA INVITATIONAL : Umphrey and Keswick Give Bruin Men Lead
- Cypress Upsets Ventura in Regional Final
- Woods' Work Keeps Toreros in Tournament : College basketball: USD defeats Gonzaga, 72-62, with help from forward's 23 points. Woods is selected to All-WCC first time, and now ranks top active player on tournament career scoring list.
- INTERVIEW : Voice No. 1,001 : Her TV show is history, but Tracey Ullman has found another offbeat American misfit to play, this time on Broadway
- Gardening : New Tastes, Old Favorites in Spring Vegetables : Produce: Squash, watermelon and pole beans top the list as 1991 All-America Winners.
- Good Golly, Mr. Ollie : OPENING ARGUMENTS: A Young Lawyer's First Case: United States v. Oliver North, <i> By Jeffrey Toobin (Viking: $22.95; 384 pp.)</i>
- Los Angeles CountyPARAMOUNT: Phase 2 of Terry/Nikols...
- Home Improvement : Hone Money-Saving Skills in Remodeling
- 'Yearbook': The Real Thing
- Reporter Loses Credentials Over Hussein Asylum Story
- Pilot Crash-Lands Plane Near Dam
- AIDS Keeps Expanding Its Deadly Reach : Victims: Family members of two who have died of disease talk about its effects on their loved ones.
- MIKE SCIOSCIA IS The Glue in Blue : The Dodger Catcher Has Been 'Irreplaceable' for More Than a Decade, but He Never Forgets Philadelphia or Family
- SOUTHERN SECTION CHAMPIONSHIPS : Palos Verdes Girls Crush Lompoc
- COLLEGE BASKETBALL / WCC TOURNAMENT : San Diego Beats Gonzaga, 72-62
- Bowe Knocks Out Biggs in Eighth Round
- Loyola, St. Mary's Split Doubleheader
- UCI Sends Mulligan Out in Grand Style
- TODAY'S NEWS, TOMORROW'S TELEVISION : Who is Dale Midkiff and why is he doing all these TV movies?
- Altadena : Golf Course Work Begins
- Man to Serve 2 Years for Embezzlement
- Hard-Pressed to Have Fun : Yuppies Take Leisure Time as Seriously as Work and That's Why They Can't Relax, Experts Say
- Port Will Pay $3.5 Million to End Rift Over Trade Center : Development: Both sides are pleased to end the dispute over office space that the harbor leased but never used.
- Jackie Lynn Buck has been named vice...
- Star Power : Barry Brown Is Bringing Broadway to Long Beach
- Israelis Fear Another Loss After Victory : Mideast: They recall a string of battlefield successes blemished by political setbacks.
- Gotta Sing! : Fred Astaire movies make a complete songbook of composers' classics
- Elder Statesmen : An Era Is Passing for Five Authors Known for Reclaiming the Role of Blacks in History
- Jerusalem Official Calls for a Schwarzkopf Street
- Bangkok Blaze Kills 3
- PERSPECTIVE ON FREE TRADE : Protectionism in Social-Welfare Clothing
- Coup de Cafe : Restaurant Reacts to Gorky's and Invites Homeless to Free Meal
- Man Given 38 Years to Life in Torrance 'Ninja' Killing
- NBA ROUNDUP : Bulls Still Can't Win in Indiana
- SOUTHERN SECTION BASKETBALL PLAYOFF CHAMPIONSHIPS : With Beilstein in Uniform, Tustin a Winner
- WOMEN'S BASKETBALL JC STATE CHAMPIONSHIPS : Golden West Holds On to Win Title
- Pepperdine, Santa Clara Dominate WCC Team
- Valley Digs Hole Too Deep to Fill, 77-75
- Times Named One of 10 Best
- JAZZ : ALBUM REVIEWS : *** 1/2 : DON GROLNICK : "Weaver of Dreams" : <i> Blue Note</i>
- GOLF SENIORS AT OJAI : Crampton's 65 Leads Quick-Starting Field
- SAY IT LOUD: James Brown finally gets...
- RESTAURANTS : A Master of the Art of Bi-Cuisine Performs at Symphonie : A noted pioneer in Franco-Japanese cooking runs his own shop in Torrance
- The Times Poll That Found Support for Toll Roads in Orange County--Is the Majority Always Right?
- The House of a Different Color--Laguna Design Panel Is Right
- Jackson Drive
- The House of a Different Color--Laguna Design Panel Is Right
- Creation of 4-Year Mayor Post Decried
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- 'Degenerate Art': For Some, Ugly Too Is in the Eye of the Beholder
- Spirit of People Tipped the Scale
- Archbishop on Violence
- Won't somebody tell "Into the Night" host...
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- Jackson Drive
- Proposals on Bank Reform
- The Times Poll That Found Support for Toll Roads in Orange County--Is the Majority Always Right?
- Rights of the Child
- Army's Check Will Soon Be in Mail to Contractor
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- Archbishop on Violence
- Note to Fred Dryer:
- Facing Up to Child Abuse Costs
- Serious Underlying Problems in California May Bring Bigger Fall Than in New England
- Proposals on Bank Reform
- Need Rather Than Greed Drives Insurance Sales
- League Realignment Is Approved
- 'Marxist Teachers' Charge by Rep. Dornan
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- WHAT'S THE RUSH?
- German Auto Makers Got a Lift Into Japan
- HAILEY'S HOMELESS
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- NONFICTION - March 3, 1991
- AMD Wins Court Fight to Use of '386' on Intel Chip Clone
- Bank of Boston Reportedly Approaches Buffett: The...
- HOME IMPROVEMENT : Key to Faster, Better Cleaning Is Getting a System, Experts Say
- Doors Leave Their Mark : Park Expects More Visitors Because of Cavern Shown in Movie on Rock Band, but Some Remain Angry About Film
- Jack Levand; Westside Businessman, Philanthropist
- NATION IN BRIEF : SOUTH CAROLINA : Ex-Lawmakers Plead Guilty to Bribery
- Woman Acquitted of Gorbachev Insult
- PERSIAN GULF SPILLS
- Yugoslavs Reach Impasse Over New Federation
- Soviet Coal Miners Strike, Demand Gorbachev Resign
- AFTERMATH OF WAR : Gulf Weather
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The Home Front : Words on the Gulf
- NATION IN BRIEF : RHODE ISLAND : Layoffs, Government Shutdown to Come
- Gulf Tensions Seen as Factor in Record Level of Hate Crimes : County: Incidents against Arab-Americans and Muslims increased during 1990, report says.
- Grim Scenes Greeted Inspectors
- 35th Senate Vote Could Be Contest of More-Conservative-Than-Thou : Politics: With a big GOP majority in the district, four Republican front-runners vie for what promises to be a scant turnout of voters.
- Tough Issues Require a Mature Discussion : Governor, educators: Stop shouting and start talking
- ORANGE COUNTY PERSPECTIVE : Unwittingly Stoking Cityhood Fires
- Fullerton College Baseball Player Killed in Crash
- HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL SOUTHERN SECTION GIRLS' CHAMPIONSHIPS : DIVISION I-A
- The Eye Has It : CBS Wins Sweeps With Programming--and Luck
- Bush Sends Controversial Trade Bill to Congress : Legislation: It would extend a system under which lawmakers cannot amend international agreements that the United States negotiates.
- Freeway to Replace Double-Deck Road That Fell in Quake
- AFTERMATH OF WAR : C-130 Hercules
- Trial Ordered in Detroit Suicide Case
- COLUMN ONE : A Rallying Point for Iraqi Exiles : In the aftermath of war, their world is alive with possibilities. Many are trying to overcome rivalries--even hatred--to oust Hussein and shape their homeland's future.
- Torn Canopy Sparks Design Flap : Convention Center: Engineers try to figure out why giant tent panel ripped to shreds during rainstorm.
- DANA POINT : Sheriff's Deputies to Begin Bike Patrols
- Military Finds That Patriotic Songwriting Is at a Fever Pitch
- 500,000 May Starve in Mozambique Drought
- New Coroner Choice Is No Stranger to Controversy
- Due Date for County Fee Ignored by Schools : Education: The assessments for handling property taxes total more than $3 million countywide. Most districts have joined a class-action suit.
- Girl Brings Kuwaiti Culture to O.C. Class
- Santa Ana Wins First Soccer Title : Division 4-A: Five goals in second half propel Saints past Beverly Hills. Gus Plasencia scores three times in 5-1 victory.
- The San Antonio Spurs agreed to contract...
- The Ironic Co-Existence of Things Natural, Nuclear : Art: Photographer Patrick Nagatani discusses his latest series of pictures and collages at the Irvine Fine Arts Center.
- NBA ROUNDUP : Barkley, Philadelphia Pound Portland, 121-111
- Carreon Takes His Best Shot at Stardom : Division I-A: After sitting out last year, and losing starting job this year, Marina senior hits a game-winner.
- POP MUSIC REVIEW : Venerable Hot Tuna Takes Time to Cook : After a cold start with thin and bland vocals, the blues-folk band took its performance into high gear at the Coach House.
- THE MIDEAST'S RECORD ON CEASE-FIRES
- CALIFORNIA IN BRIEF : SOUTH LAKE TAHOE : No Serious Injuries in Bus Crash in Snow
- White House Backs Waivers of Job Bias Suits
- Images of War: Carnage, the Last Push, Nightmares : In the hospital: Injured Americans recall horror of seeing friends die in battle.
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The Home Front : Other Hostages
- Santa Rossa Valley : Operator Relays Messages to Troops
- When Some Don't Want to Go Home
- Colombian Drug Path Leads to Record Seizure : Narcotics: The discovery of 110 pounds of cocaine is the largest find in Conejo Valley history, authorities say.
- Special Home Proposed for Foster 'Graduates' : Social services: Many youths have no shelter and no one to turn to once they leave county supervision.
- Channel Islands Poised for Run at 3rd Place in State Wrestling
- COMMUNITY COLLEGE MEN'S BASKETBALL : Rancho Santiago, Cypress Both Play for State Berths
- Campbell Hall Squanders Lead in 64-59 Defeat
- WEEKEND TV : Focus on Aftermath of the Gulf War
- 'Fledermaus' Tenor Began as Vegas Showman
- 90 Investors File Civil Suits Against Pioneer Mortgage
- First Interstate Selling Oklahoma Bank: The Los...
- Square D Wins Round in Takeover Bid:...
- Regulators Urge Banks to Loosen the Purse Strings
- AFTERMATH OF WAR : Destroyed Armor: Recycle?
- The Day in the Gulf
- AFTERMATH OF WAR : Going Home
- City Seeks Business Park Developer for Parcel at Palmdale Airport
- 6.0 Quake Hits Costa Rica
- AFTERMATH OF WAR : Admiration for Military Men, Women Is Uniform
- THOUSAND OAKS : Bail Reduced 94% for Fraud Suspect
- A Foul on 'Silk'
- Washington's James to Speak at Clinic
- Glendale Player, Coach Honored
- CSUN Completes Home Schedule With 115-98 Loss to Southern Utah
- Ermolenko Is Favored in Field for American Final at Long Beach
- NHL ROUNDUP : Flames Pull Within Four Points of Kings, 6-2
- Gibson Adds His Mix to Royals' Chemistry : Baseball: He puts Dodgers behind him. Ahead is a role as outfielder, designated hitter and catalyst to underachievers.
- King Broadcasting to Sell Its TV and Cable Units
- Bush Sends Controversial Trade Bill to Congress : Legislation: It would extend a system under which lawmakers cannot amend international agreements that the United States negotiates.
- Navy Wives Sew Own 'Medal' for Princeton Crew
- Salvadoran Guerrillas Kill 17 in Power Plant Attack
- Parents Rejoice That War Is Over and Five Are Safe
- Countywide : Congressman Offers Kuwait Political Aid
- City Council Creates Endowment for the Arts
- Filmmakers who prefer not to shoot in...
- Suspect in Strangling Pleads Not Guilty : Crime: The body of Najat Chehade, 26, was found dumped off a road near Ojai in December. Louis Hayden Gary, 42, was arrested in Idaho.
- Slumlord Begins Serving 4-Month Jail Sentence
- Opponents of Utility Merger at Odds Over Review Plans
- Valley Beats Bakersfield to Reach Title Game : College basketball: Monarchs to face Golden West after rallying for 89-80 win.
- Moorpark Pair on All-Star Team
- MULLIGAN ON HIS ALL-TIME ANTEATERS
- Third Base Isn't Dodgers' Charm : Baseball: Since Cey was traded before '83 season, 23 players have been tried there.
- SPORTS ON WEEKEND TV : Basketball, Hockey, Marathon Action
- $1 Million Pacific Classic Is Highlight at Del Mar
- Palmisano, Lancers Down Buena, 67-57 : Prep basketball: Thousand Oaks wins first girls' title behind junior guard's game-high 24 points, nine rebounds.
- Christian Theater Company Enjoys Continuing Prosperity : Stage: Despite some confusion about its orientation, Lamb's Players Theatre enters its 20th year as a commercial and critical success.
- Music Reviews : Sanderling Conducts Philharmonic
- 'Decency Day' to Air a Free-Speech Marathon : Radio: Organizers hope the anti-censorship program will make public aware of the restrictions that college stations are forced to operate under.
- NBC Posts Sharp Profit Decline: NBC reported...
- Realty Trust Emerges From Bankruptcy: Mortgage &...
- Allies and Iraqis Plan Talks Sunday on Cease-Fire, POWs : Diplomacy: The meeting of military commanders was delayed for one day. Cheney says the air war will be resumed if Baghdad makes new, hostile gestures.
- NATION IN BRIEF : NEW JERSEY : Judge Reduces Prison Term for 'Terrorist'
- Post-Mortem on Coroner Job: Homes Too Pricey
- Revival of Meetings, Conventions Awaited : Travel: An industry group postponed its own gathering so members could sort out company travel plans. Recovery could take months.
- Leading Indicators Take Sixth Drop in a Row : Economy: A separate report puts construction spending at a four-year low.
- U.S. Probes Claim That Lab Falsified Data on Pesticides
- Fugitive Alleged Nazi Charged in World War II Deaths of 3,400
- Mourners, Shoppers in Baghdad : Iraq: Relieved that air raids are over, war-weary residents visit mosques to pray for the dead.
- Jordan's King Hussein Calls for Forgiveness and Unity Among Arabs : Diplomacy: He reaches out to Kuwait and Iraq in a subdued speech after the 'sad drama' of war.
- Rainfall Fails to Quench Drought's Thirst : Weather: Parched ground soaks up water. Some officials are encouraged by signs of a larger storm pattern.
- Park Service Did Not Bill Utility Fees
- Jury Calls for Life Term in 1985 Rape, Murder
- NEWPORT BEACH : 'Birdman' Reunited With Stolen Parrots
- Reputed Crime Figure Seeking Plea Bargain, Attorneys Say : Trial: Robert Paduano is reported close to an agreement with prosecutors. The suspect's presence in the judge's chambers during negotiations is unusual.
- Countywide : Bid to Open Pretrial Hearings Is Set Back
- Latest Rainstorm Packs a Punch
- Ventura Girls Seek 1st Title in Basketball in 15 Seasons
- PREP ROUNDUP : Povirk's 27 Kills Lead Irvine Past Ocean View
- ART REVIEW : The Odd Vision of a Man From Normal
- Those Daring Young Men in the Cirque's Front Office
- Merger Rumors Lift Security Pacific and Wells Fargo Stocks
- FURNISHINGS : ARTISANS: Spotlighting makers of hand-crafted goods : Now That Country Decorating Is In, Quilts Are Out of Closet
- Millions of Iraqis Face Threat of Epidemics, U.N. Health Officials Warn : Medicine: They cite an urgent need to restore water supplies, food stocks and medical services.
- Bush's Popularity Surges in Europe in Conflict's Wake : Reaction: His prowess in guiding the victorious allied coalition draws a torrent of praise.
- Kuwait's Rebels Vow to Speak Out
- BELL CANYON : Man Guilty of Rape Granted Appeal Bail
- Images of War: Carnage, the Last Push, Nightmares : On the road: Bodies of Iraqi soldiers lie beside the booty they tried to take.
- Tests Show Rise in Toxic Levels at Old Plant Site : Ground water: Despite jump in contaminants, official says there is no threat to Thousand Oaks drinking supplies.
- THOUSAND OAKS : Fire in Car Engine Damages House
- Moorpark : City Earmarks U.S. Funds for Club Site
- Boxing
- SCC Plays Biola, CCI Takes On Westmont in District 3 Semifinals
- Valhalla, With 3 Wrestlers in Semifinals, in 2nd Place
- HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL CITY 3-A GIRLS' FINAL : Roosevelt Wins Its First Title
- Northridge Site of 4-Way Meet
- Westchester Wins 4-A Title : Boys' basketball: Third try is the charm for the Comets, who beat Manual Arts, 65-57, in City final.
- Sports Service May Be Victim of FNN Sale : Television: While buyer NBC has made no decision, the service duplicates some of CNBC programming.
- MUSIC REVIEW : Chamber Music Society Program at Chapman
- Film World Comes to Town : Movies: Up to 5,000 people from 59 countries are expected to attend the industry's biggest trade event in Santa Monica.
- Drive Seeks $2 Million in Aid for Troops' Families
- Gang Leader Sentenced to 31 Years in Shooting
- General Hospital Succumbs to Money Woes
- Landfill Closure Casts Doubt on Cleanup Funds
- DIVISION IV BOYS' PLAYOFFS : Lincoln Struggles But Wins
- HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL SOUTHERN SECTION GIRLS' CHAMPIONSHIPS : Morningside Keeps Rolling, Beats Chino, 52-47
- For Runners, It's All in Appearance : Marathon: L.A. race offers rich payday to those who do well, not to elite athletes seeking money merely to show up.
- DODGERS : Hatcher Works, Laughs, Wonders About Future
- Ex-Redskin May Signs With Chargers
- Sexuality Reports Back Presbyterian, Episcopal Changes : Task force: Opposition is rising among Presbyterians to recommendations, including ordination of homosexuals and endorsement of 'responsible' sex outside marriage.
- College Basketball
- Unwrapping 'Fun in a Box' Series on Videocassettes
- Diverse Acoustic Styles Mark McCutcheon's Musical Talent
- Retailers Banking On Postwar Buying Spree : Economy: After a drop in taxable sales in the third quarter of 1990, county merchants anticipate an upturn with purchases of big-ticket items.
- FNN Files for Bankruptcy: Financial News Network...
- Poverty and Harsh Critics Surround Calcutta's Island of Communism : India: Even the party's enemies admit it will continue to rule West Bengal state for some time. Its strength is an ability to maintain law and order.
- Carolco Talks to Potential Investors: Carolco Pictures...
- Treaty to Make Bombs Easier for Airports to Spot
- Rev. Howard Spragg; Active in Aiding Laborers
- Edwin Land; Inventor of Polaroid Camera
- Mildred G. Wilcox; Retired Teacher
- From Sky and on Ground, Storm Wages War on Roads, Houses : Rain: A store roof collapses, streets are closed and the elements share blame for a $100,000 structure fire.
- EL TORO : Knife-Wielding Man Robs Del Taco Outlet
- Police Arrest 6 on Prostitution Charges
- Countywide : A Textbook Emergency Plan for All
- Mulligan's Quest Is to Win One More : Irvine: Tonight's game will close out an era. Pregame ceremony, postgame party are planned.
- HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL CITY 3-A BOYS' FINAL : No Surprise, Fremont Coasts Past North Hollywood, 70-37
- L.A. Gear's Ad Agency Walks After 3 Months : Athletic shoes: Creative and strategic differences cited by Los Angeles office of BBDO Worldwide.
- GM's Electric Car to Be Made in...
- CLIPBOARD : Home-Building Permit Values
- Reagan Praises Marine Families
- Gulf War Dims Democrats' Hopes for Presidency : Politics: Some are considering putting up only a token candidate. Bush's leadership in crisis has dramatically enhanced his stature with voters.
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The Diplomatic Front : In Iran
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The International Front : Polls: Bush Rating High
- More Bombs Threatened at Nervous UC Campus : Santa Barbara: Police find no explosives this time. Two devices were discovered earlier.
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The International Front : Iraqi Songs
- Charges Considered in Children's Death
- Alternative Voices : Student Magazines on UCLA Campus Boldly Fill a Media Void
- Nothing Quite Says It Like a Big Parade
- CLIPBOARD : Hazardous Spills Review
- Ventura, Canyons Brace for Title Games
- Lakers Breathe a Sigh of Relief : Pro basketball: After Orlando takes 25-15 lead, L.A. dominates second half with its own Magic and cuts Portland's margin to 1 1/2 games with 115-101 victory.
- Two Titans Suspended After Arrest : Fullerton: Freshman basketball players Vernon and Bloodworth charged in connection with the use of stolen credit cards.
- COLLEGE ROUNDUP : In Four Hours, Titans Pound Out 20 Hits, Rout Jacksonville, 25-5
- Skiing
- TV Reviews : Jaclyn Smith Turns the Tables in 'Lies'
- Stardust Memories at Final Curtain of 'Lido' : Las Vegas: Four hundred former showgirls share in cast's farewell to the show, which is being replaced by a new musical production opening in July.
- CLASSICAL MUSIC : Talmi to Bring Back U.S. Music to Symphony in Fall
- Actress Audrey Landers Always Dreamed of Being a Torch Singer
- Rosanne Cash in a Melancholy Mood
- MIDEAST UPDATE
- AFTERMATH OF WAR: The Diplomatic Front : In Kuwait
- NEWS ANALYSIS : In Just 7 Months, U.S. Foreign Ties Took Sharp Turns : Policy: The honeymoon with Moscow ended. And expectations for special relations with Tokyo and Bonn have dimmed.
- U.S. Withholds Aid to Pressure Peru Into Drug Fight : Narcotics: Andean nation must ensure military's support, State Department says. Report is upbeat about progress elsewhere.
- San Gabriel Valley Has an Identity Crisis--It Doesn't Have One
- Reagan Praises Marine Families in Patriotic Message of Thanks
- Storm Ebbs but Another on Way
- Countywide : Annual Women's Conference a Sellout
- Baby Boy Was Born Alive, Then Killed
- Nurse Looks Familiar
- Illinois Won't Seek to Extradite Tax Scofflaw
- ANAHEIM : Council Rejects Wall Across Noisy Street
- HUNTINGTON BEACH : Man Sought in Robbery of $7,000
- HUNTINGTON BEACH : City, Residents Argue Water Conservation
- Moscow Writer Searches for Soviet No-Goodniks in L.A.
- Day 1 of Rationing Leaves DWP Inundated : Water: A flood of calls sinks phone system. They deal not with drought but with power outages caused during rainstorm.
- ANGELS : Bannister Takes Advantage of the Rain
- HIGH SCHOOL SOCCER : Santa Ana Ends Long Wait, Wins Section 4-A Crown
- He Might Find Some Teeth in the Law
- COMMUNITY COLLEGE ROUNDUP : Golden West Gains State Final With Victory Over Sequoias
- SANTA ANITA : Mabee Emerging as Triple Threat
- STAGE REVIEW : 'Sing for Your Supper' Is Tasty Comedy
- Grammys, Prayer, Women and Dylan
- Everyone Wants to Be on Front Page, but . . .
- Maybe Chick Is Wearing a Few Too Many Hats